Starting Over
by motown lady
Summary: Lee and Amanda's relationship changes after a car accident leaves her with a head injury. Set after "Over The Limit."
1. Chapter 1

Starting Over

Lee and Amanda were in an Agency-mandated therapy session for partners. A new program set by the Agency's director, Dr. Smyth. It was designed to see how effective they were on the job, and how each case defines how well they work together. They began talking easily, about each other's concerns-he didn't like how she didn't always stay where he told her, and she didn't like how he was so dismissive of her ideas on how to handle a case.

Lee shook his head, saying," Ok, Pfaff, so, how would you handle it? Would you be the good guy all the time like she tries to be?"

Looking at his partner, he said,"You know, Amanda, there are a lot of bad people in the world who don't have time to be reasoned with- in fact, they'd rather kill than talk- it's not like bullies that you try to defend yourself with- these people don't care who they hurt or why- our job is to stop them before they attack. But you haven't been at this long enough to really grasp what I'm saying.."

Amanda tersely said,"I wouldn't have been here at all, if you hadn't been so desperate that day! What could I have possibly been thinking about? Helping a dangerous man, doing a dangerous job!" Lee muttered,"Well, I saw you weren't busy, so I asked for your help- you could've just said no!"

Amanda said,"Oh, no, buster-don't put this on me! You saw dozens of people-why me?!" Lee said,angrily,"Well, that's what I'm wondering, since it got screwed up to begin with! If you had just given that package-.."

Then the real yelling started, and then they both slammed out of the room, telling each other to go to hell!

The rain fell in big drops, and pelted Amanda's windshield, as she squealed out of the Agency parking lot that night after work. Lost in her own anguished thoughts, she didn't see the truck until it was too late! Metal meshed with glass,and Amanda's world went dark!

Lee was at the elevator when Billy called him back! "Scarecrow! It's Amanda-she's been in a car accident-they're taking her to Parker General!" Soon, he, Billy, and Francine were all waiting in the hospital for word of her condition. The doctor came out, and said,"She's in critical condition, and needs to have emergency surgery to relieve the swelling in her brain- I need to locate her family.." Lee said,"I don't remember if she said they were away or not.."

Billy said,"I'll sign whatever paperwork you need- Francine, try to track her mother down.. Scarecrow, this wasn't your fault-you know that right?" Lee sighed."We argued, Billy- I didn't get to apologize!" Billy nodded. "You will- keep good thoughts, all right? I'll be back.."

When they left, Lee headed for the ICU. Going in, he wasn't prepared for how she looked! Her entire head was bandaged, and she had cuts and bruises in various places. He gulped, and got a chair, and sat down near her.

Taking her hand, he kissed it, saying,"I hope you can hear me- I want you to know how sorry I am for our fight- this shouldn't have happened, and it wouldn't have, except for your pig-headed fool of a partner! I'm gonna be here to see you through this-.." He then saw a nurse with the doctor come in, and stood up, saying, "Oh, boy, now I'm gonna get it.." He kissed her mouth gently, and whispered,"See ya later.."

When he came out of the room, Billy met him in the waiting area. Billy said,"Well, I had a feeling you would try that! How is she?!" Lee sat down, and the enormity of what had happened hit him like a ton of bricks! He shook his head and cried,"What if she dies, Billy?! What have I done?!"

Billy sat down next to him, and said forcefully,"Look- you two argued-it happens- this wasn't your fault!" Lee groaned, wiping tears away from his face," She wouldn't have driven upset like that if it wasn't for that fight!"

Billy patted his shoulder,"Lee, she'll be all right- you've got to hang on to that.." He then saw Francine, and said,"Did you get a hold of Mrs. West?" Francine nodded," Yes-we found her at her sister's- she'll be here soon.."

Billy and Lee stood up, and Billy said,"Ok, Francine, you and Lee head down to the cafeteria for a while, and I'll stay here, and explain things to her mother-.." Lee said,"Billy, shouldn't I-?.."

Billy gave him a look only a boss gives one who is being reprimanded!"Scarecrow, get out of here now.. I will deal with this..Francine, keep an eye on him- I'll join you when it's clear.."

As they went down in the elevator, Lee said,"Geez, Francine, this was my fault! I think I should have been there-what if she-?.." Francine said,"She won't, and you wanna know why? Because number one, her family- she won't give up them for anything, and number two, she wouldn't leave this earth without winning a stupid argument with you!"

They got in the cafeteria, and got coffee- they weren't hungry. Sitting down, Francine said,"Does Amanda knit?" Lee, joining her, said,"What?!" Francine said,"I just remembered that after I met her, I made that knitting comment to you- I just wondered.." Lee shook his head, a gave a low whistle! "Maybe when they're done fixing Amanda, they can take a look at you.." Francine said,"Ooh, ha-ha- funny man.."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

As Lee and Francine were finishing their coffee, Billy joined them. Lee said,"How's Amanda?" Billy replied,"She just went into surgery- I spoke to Mrs. West, telling her this happened just after Amanda left for the day. I also spoke with the police- the truck driver was shook up and even asked about Amanda."

Continuing, he said,"From what the police can determine from the accident, the roads were slippery, and it appears that Amanda may have lost control of her car..we'll have to see what she can remember when she wakes up.."

Just then, Dotty West entered the cafeteria, and the cashier at the counter said,"Coffee?" Dotty nodded,"Cream and sugar, please.." While she waited, she looked at Billy, and he came toward her."Why don't you join us, please?" She got her coffee, and went to sit down, while Billy brought over another chair for himself.

Dotty then looked at Francine,"We've met before, correct? At my house?" Francine looked at Lee, and he shrugged. as if to say, tell her what you have to. She swallowed hard, and said,"Yes, I was one of her pet sitting clients-unfortunately, the chimpanzee I had ran off, so then I didn't get another pet- I was too busy at my current job at IFF.."

Dotty nodded,"I see- so you thought of her when she suddenly had that job-she got it through you.."

Billy chimed in,"Yes, Francine recommended her highly for the position of associate director of International Federal Film, and has been doing a top-notch job for us-editing film, scouting locales for us- a real go-getter.."

Dotty smiled,"She's so like her late father in that way- I'm very proud of all she's done since her divorce- it's been hard, raising two boys on her own- of course, I help a little, but the bulk of things has been on her.."

Billy said, nodding to Lee,"And this is Lee Stetson, our director- who has taken her under his wing, so to speak." Lee said,"We're all praying for her, Mrs. West- by the way, where are her boys?"

Dotty sipped her coffee, saying,"Well, they're at a sleepover tonight..I called their father,Joe King-he should be arriving from Africa tomorrow- they don't know anything yet- I thought it best until I knew what the situation was.."

Billy said,"Well, we've seen just how strong she is- she'll pull through, no doubt..now, is there anything we can do for you?"

Dotty joked,"Better coffee- this is absolute arsenic!" They all chuckled in agreement. Then, over the P.A., they heard Billy's name being called. He stood up, saying,"That's from the office- I should go- Francine, you too- our supervising producer wants an update on our latest project."

Lee said,"Billy, if you don't mind, I'm gonna keep Mrs. West company- I feel like I should.." Billy nodded,"Fine- keep us informed, ok?"

They said goodbye, and left. Lee said,"Well, why don't we head back up? There may be news by now.." When they arrived back at the waiting area, a nurse approached them, saying,"Mrs. King's surgery is over- the doctor will see you in a few minutes- she's on her way to Recovery.."

Dotty thanked her, and she and Lee sat down. Dotty said,"Lee, you're being very nice, sticking around, but I'll be fine.." Lee smiled,"Well, thank you, but I care about Amanda, so I'm staying put.."

The doctor then came out, and they stood said,"How's Amanda?" Dotty said,"When can I see her?" The doctor said,"Her surgery went well- the cranial pressure was relieved, and her vitals appear to be stronger,but we won't have any real answers until she wakes up, which probably won't be until tomorrow. If you leave me a number where I can reach you-.."

Dotty shook her head."Ah, no- I'm not leaving her- I will however, go check on my grandchildren-excuse me, there's a pay phone down the hall I can see.." When she left, Lee said to the doctor,"Is there somewhere for her to lay down tonight- please?"

The doctor nodded,"Near the Recovery wing- there's a place for family members-cots are available- I'll let them know you're going to be there- try not to worry-we're doing everything we can for Mrs. King..now, excuse me, I have to see my other patients."

He left, and Dotty came back, and said,"What did he say? Where is he going?" Lee said,"There's cots for us in the Recovery wing-c'mon, let's get some rest.."

It was past midnight when Dotty finally drifted off. Lee slept on and off, and at one point, he woke at 4 AM to find her gone! He got up to search, and came upon the hospital chapel.

He didn't know why that hadn't occurred to him sooner. He went in quietly, not wanting to disturb her, and seated himself in the back pew. He heard her say,"Carl, our baby girl needs our help-now more than ever-so, please, darling, go be with her, and let her know everything is going to be all right..God, help us all get through this-I don't ask for much, but her children and I need her very much-she's my only girl, and she means the world to me.. I can't lose her, and I won't!"

When she got up and turned to leave, Lee was already outside, and turning a corner. He waited until he saw her go in the opposite direction, and then went back in. Going toward the altar, he lit one of the candles, and then knelt on the front pew.

Deeply sighing, he said,"I know it's been a long time- not since Mom and Dad's funeral-anyway, I need you to help Amanda get better- I care about her very much- even though I haven't expressed it to her yet- I know I have to tell her soon- I'm with Dotty on this one- I can't lose her either."

Getting up, he turned to leave, and then looked up, and said,"Mr. West, you've got one hell of a girl there, and I hope your wife's prayers get answered- I'm real sorry I didn't get to meet you- she thought the world of you.."

When he got back, he saw Dotty was sitting on the cot. She said to him,"It helps, doesn't it? Going to the chapel?" Lee chuckled."How did you-..? Never mind- let's try and get some more sleep, huh?"

When they each laid down again on their own cots, Dotty's mind turned to questions. As in,why hasn't Amanda brought him home before, and better yet, why has she not mentioned him before? She would have to grill her daughter when she was back on her feet!

Lee's mind went to,Ok, I care about her-now what? If I tell her, will she feel the same, or will she be gun-shy because of her divorce, and afraid to try again?

The two fell asleep, each with their own worries..

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Starting Over-Chapter 3

The young woman woke up slowly, and looked around the room. It was a hospital room, but she had no idea how or when she got there. She was hooked up to something,and as she tried to move,she was met with pain! "Ooh!" She then saw a button on the bar of her bed, and pushed it, and her bed brought her sitting up. She pressed again to stop it, and then found a call button, and once again, pressed.

Immediately, a nurse came in."Mrs. King, you're awake! I'll go get the doctor, and let your mother know.." She left, but soon, the doctor came in with her, saying,"Hello, Mrs. King- I'm Dr. Harris- do you remember anything from last night?"

The woman shook her head,"No-what did you call me?" The doctor said,"Your name is Amanda King- it doesn't ring a bell?" Amanda shook her head,"No- what happened to me?"

The doctor said,"You had a car accident- we had to perform surgery to relieve cranial pressure-now, memory loss is to be expected, so don't worry if it doesn't come back right away-you've been through major surgery- it will take time- we'll see in a few days where we're at- in the meantime, would you like to see your mother?"

Amanda shrugged."I guess.." The doctor said to the nurse,"Patty, would you bring in here-oh, and her friend from IFF as well.." The nurse nodded, and left the room.

The doctor was checking Amanda over when Dotty came in. The doctor saw Dotty and said,"I'll leave you now- I'll check back later.."

Dotty was stunned at the bandaged head, and the bruises, but recovered quickly, and went to give her a gentle hug." I'm so glad you're awake- I knew your daddy was with you when I told him to stay with you- oh, honey, you're gonna be just fine!"

Amanda said,"Daddy? I have a daddy..ok, you are my mother? So,where is this daddy?" Dotty said,"Of course, you're confused after all this- your daddy-we lost him when you were in college- I'm sorry- I just meant I was praying to him to ask him to watch over you last night.."

Pulling a photo from her purse, she said,"Here, darling- this is your daddy-you remember him?"

Amanda looked at the photo, but shook her head,"No,I'm sorry- he looks nice.." Dotty sadly said,"Yes, oh, he was- and you were his whole world-next to me, of course.. I'll tell you anything you want to know- oh, and your boys- I just talked to them on the phone- they want to see you of course, but I told them not for a while.."

Amanda said,"Um, what about the friend from my job?" Dotty was surprised that Amanda didn't react to mention of her children."Uh, well,oh, he said he had to call work to tell them how you were doing- do you want me to get him?"

Amanda nodded, "Yeah- maybe he can tell me what's happening here- why don't you go see those boys, and I'll talk to you later- um, I'm sorry, Mrs. West-please go now?"

Dotty nodded numbly, and left. Lee met her in the hall. and said,"Hey- are you all right?!" Dotty said tearfully,"She doesn't remember me, or her father! When I mentioned her own children, she..she..!" Lee held her as she wept! "I'm so sorry, Mrs. West- it's gonna take a while for her to come back, I guess.. hey, let's find the doctor, and get some answers, huh?"

The doctor met them in the cafeteria, and told them,"It's unfortunate, but memory loss such as this often occurs with this type of surgery- we can't rush things- I'll be doing more tests, and moving her into a private room later this afternoon-but please- don't lose hope- she needs all the love and encouragement you can give her- I'll see at the end of the week, if she's strong enough to go home, and then we'll go from there.."

Lee and Dotty thanked him and he left. Just then, Dotty saw a man enter the cafeteria, looking around. She jumped up, and went to the man's arms!"Joe! Oh, Joe, I'm so glad you're here!" Lee sighed. Amanda's ex-husband, Joe King-of course.. he should be here, but still..

Lee wanted time alone with Amanda, to see what she may remember about him, but he also knew family was more important here, so he'd wait- as long as he had to. He stood up, and went to Dotty, saying,"I'm gonna go- please tell Amanda I'll be back later-.."

But Dotty said,"No, wait- Lee Stetson, this is Joe King, Amanda's ex-husband, and her children's father-please stay, Lee- she needs all of us right now-please?"

Lee nodded,"Nice to meet you, Joe.." Joe shook his hand, and said,"So, Amanda had a car accident?! What happened?!" Lee said, nodding to the table,"Let's sit- I'll tell you what I can.."

Lee related Amanda's job at IFF, and then said,"There was a therapy session-mandated by our boss-to iron out work-related problems..well, we argued, and left before the session was over, and the accident happened right after she left-slippery roads,and all.. I got word as I was leaving for the day- I'm real sorry, Joe, and Mrs. West, you as well.."

Dotty put her hand on his arm."No, Lee- people argue- things happen- she will get through this-I know it.." Joe said, getting up,"I'm gonna see her, and then my boys-how are they, Dotty?"

Dotty sighed,"They want to see her, but I told them, not for a while yet-she doesn't remember anything so far- the doctor told us not to rush her.."

Joe nodded, and Dotty told him to head for the Recovery area. He left, and Lee said,"Well, I have to check in with my boss- I'll be back, ok?" Dotty nodded, and Lee walked her back to Recovery, and then left himself.

Dotty went back to the chapel. She would be spending a lot of time there, waiting for Amanda to recover..

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Starting Over- Chapter 4

Later that afternoon, Lee went to see Billy. Billy said,"How's Amanda?" Lee shook his head."She's a total blank-no memories of her family, nothing so far- her ex-husband, Joe King is with her right now- god only knows what'll happen when she sees her kids finally.."

Billy nodded."Lee, you just have to be patient-she'll come back-.." Lee said,"Oh, you didn't see her mother- it absolutely destroyed her when Amanda didn't remember her- or her father.. I saw her at one point in the hospital chapel, begging for help from her late husband- I tried to sneak away, but somehow she knew I'd been there anyway-weird.."

Billy smiled, and Lee said,"What?" Billy said," You know, there was a time when you wouldn't have given a damn about people's problems other than your own..but you've changed, Scarecrow.."

Lee shrugged,"Well, it is my partner, Billy- I do have some responsibility in this- I want her better.." Billy chuckled, and then Lee said,"Ok, now what did I say that was so funny?!"

Billy smiled,"You called her your partner- you never really considered her that before, did you?" Lee shrugged," Well, for the moment, she's that, and my friend.." Shaking his head, he said,"Billy, what if she doesn't regain memories of this business? What does she do then?"

Billy said,"Lee, we don't do the what-if here-you know that.. anyway, have you gone home at all?" Lee said,"I was just going, but I wanted to fill you in first.." Looking at his watch, he said,"I'd better go- they were going to move Amanda to a new room shortly..unless you had some urgent stuff here- I could-?.."

Billy shook his head."You are off the roster until that girl is back on her feet- I've got Fred Fielder helping Francine with things here, so.." Lee laughed! "Oh, poor Francine!"

Billy said,"Poor Francine?! Poor me! I'm the one who has to train that bozo-now, get outta here, before I make you help him!"

Lee made a face, and said,"I'll talk to you later!" He went home, and took a quick shower, and shaved, changed, and headed back to the hospital. Dotty and Joe met him in the parking lot.

Lee said,"How is she?" Dotty said,"She's settled in her room-it's 303- she did ask for you-she was sleeping when we left, so I don't know if you want to wait 'til later, maybe?"

Lee shook his head."No- I'm taking time off work, so I can be here- how are the boys?" Joe said,"We're going to see them now- I convinced Dotty to stay home tonight- there's nothing really we can do but wait.. I want to thank you for being here, but you really don't need to stick around- I'm here now.."

Lee felt a slow anger building inside him! Who the hell did this jerk think he is, anyway?! But, for Dotty and Amanda's sake, he'd keep himself in check!" Well, I work with Amanda, and she did ask for me, so I'm gonna see her in a while, ok?"

Dotty noticed the obvious tension suddenly between the two men, and realized that Lee Stetson did care for her daughter, and felt better, knowing he'd be near her tonight, that she wouldn't be alone! She said,"Of course-well, we'll see you tomorrow then..c'mon, Joe.."

Lee saw them leave, and breathed a huge sigh of relief! Now, maybe he'd get some time alone with Amanda. He headed up to her room, and heard yelling! He came in, and Patty said,"She was having a nightmare-maybe you can calm her down?!"

Lee went to Amanda's side, and took her hand."Hey, hey, shh, shh-what's going on?!" Amanda said,"You! You said, "Ok, and I said, not bad! What does that mean?!" Lee shook his head,"Um, Amanda, slow down- I don't know what you're talking about- start from the beginning, please?"

Amanda sighed."Ok- we were near a camper talking, and you said something about my work- not bad, and I said,ok, but then you got mad- what did you mean?"

Lee said,"You remember our job? What did you remember?" Amanda said, shaking hr head,"i don't know- do we fight a lot?" Lee groaned, saying,"I wouldn't say a lot- we just have different ways of doing things to get our work done.."

Thinking slowly, he realized she remembered the case where they took the government issued camper to Arizona! He took her hand, and said,"Amanda- this camper you had in your dream- did it have weapons in it?"

Amanda nodded,"Yeah, and people were chasing us, and you hurt your leg, and I was driving-what kind of job do we have?!" Lee sighed, and said to the nurse, Patty,"Can I have some time alone here, please?"

Patty said,"Sure- just call if you need anything.." She left, and Lee got a chair and pulled it over, and sat near Amanda. "Ok, I'm gonna tell you some things that are going to scare you a little, but it's about what we do for a living- we work basically for the government.."

When Lee finished, he said,"Now, this has to stay with us, because if your mother, and ex-husband, and kids know any of this, they could be targets- I want everyone to be safe here, Amanda.."

Amanda swallowed hard, and said,"But me- it's open season on me-isn't that what you mean, Lee?" Lee got up from the chair, and sat on her bed, and gently held her, saying,"I will do whatever I can to keep you safe- please trust me on this, ok?"

Amanda felt tears come to her eyes, and nodded, pulling back slightly. They looked at each other, and it was as if, time had stood still for them. Lee had so much he wanted to say to her, but he knew it was too soon. He gently kissed her cheek, and said,"I'm gonna let you rest now..c'mon, let me help you get settled in.."

When she was back against the pillows, and comfortable, he said,"Can I get you anything before I go?" Amanda said,"Can you stay? Just until I fall asleep? Are you coming back?"

Lee smiled, taking her hand as he sat in the chair again."You just try and get rid of me-now, close your eyes.." Amanda opened one eye, and said to Lee,"You're not gonna sing to me, are you?"

Lee laughed! "N-no-they'd kick me out for sure! Go to sleep.." As he watched her, he was amazed that she seemed to be coming back, sooner than he thought, which was a very good thing for everyone..

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Starting Over- Chapter 5

Dotty and Joe, along with Phillip and Jamie, entered the King household with groceries for the next week, and as usual, the boys were arguing about who had the heaviest bag. then shoving one another, they dropped one of the bags, which had the eggs in it!

Joe cursed,"Damn it, guys, knock it off!" The two boys started blaming each other for being the clumsy one, and Joe said,"All right-that's it! Both of you, clean this mess up, and then get upstairs to do your homework- your mom's not here, but I am- I'm not in the mood for any crap today-now, move!"

As they cleaned up, Dotty helped Joe bring in the rest of the groceries, and he helped her put things away, and then he got a beer out of the fridge, and went to turn on the news on the TV,and sat down in the family room. Dotty said,"I think they'd do better if they saw her.."

Joe took a sip of his beer, and said,"What have you told them?" Dotty said,"Well, that she had a car accident, and right now, she's having problems remembering, but that she's getting stronger every day.."

Joe nodded, and then noticed the kitchen was empty, and said,"It's quiet- I'd better go see that they didn't kill each other.." Dotty hugged him, saying,"I'm glad you're here for them-grandmothers can only do so much.."

Joe shook his head saying,"Yeah, but I shoulda been here a lot more-.." Dotty said,"You're here now- that's what counts..you're right- it is too quiet.." Joe smiled,"Wish me luck.."

As he headed up, Dotty set about preparing dinner, and when she had the meatloaf put in the oven, she called the hospital, asking for Lee, knowing he'd still be there.

Lee heard the page for him as he sat in the waiting area- Amanda had gone to sleep an hour ago, and he felt he should stay out there, so she could get proper rest. He went to the nurse's station to get the phone. He answered,"Lee Stetson.."

Dotty said,"Lee? How's Amanda doing?" Lee smiled,"She's asleep right now- hey, the doctor thinks maybe tomorrow, she can get her head bandage removed-ah, she'll need help with her hair-they did have to shave some of it off, so, maybe a wig 'til it grows back? What do you think?"

Dotty smiled, and said,"I think that's a good idea-if she's open to me helping- also, Joe and I were discussing the idea of bringing the boys by-what do you think?" Lee said,"Well, I'll feel her out about it- what time do you think you'll be here tomorrow?"

Dotty sighed,"I could come early, if Joe gets the boys to school, and then if Amanda wants, he could pick them up after school, and bring them then-not for a long visit, but to make them feel better-we do have to go slow, don't we?"

Lee nodded,"Yeah- look, I know this is frustrating for all of us, but we have to believe she'll be better soon, right?" Dotty nodded, as Joe came into the kitchen with the boys."Right- well, I have some boys to feed- I'll see you both tomorrow- goodnight, Lee.."

Lee smiled,"Goodnight, Mrs. West.." When Dotty hung up, she said,"I have the meatloaf on warm-anyone hungry yet?" The boys shook their heads, and Phillip said,"We wanna see Mom-we-we miss her.." Dotty hugged both grandsons, and said,"Joe, Lee is going to talk to her early, see how she feels, ok?"

Joe nodded. "Ok, fellas, let's sit over on the couch- I wanna explain what's going on with your mom.." They sat, and he said,"Your grandma told you Mom had a car accident, right? That she isn't remembering stuff so well? Well, it's gonna take a while 'til she's herself again- right now, she doesn't know me or your grandma, so if she lets us bring you to see her, I don't want you to be scared to be around her, ok?"

Dotty said,"Your dad's right- the best thing for her is a lot of prayers, and a lot of love from you both- I think it would mean a lot to her-even if she doesn't recognize you, ok?"

While they went to eat their dinner, Lee, meanwhile, had looked in on Amanda, in her hospital room. When he turned to leave, she said sleepily,"Where you goin'?" Lee stepped back towards her, and said,"I just wanted to see how you were doing-you ok?"

Amanda nodded,"Yeah..you can stay if you want.." Lee said,"Ok.. um, I was gonna talk to you in the morning about this, but since you're awake now.." Amanda said,"What is it, Lee?"

Lee said,"I spoke to your mom earlier- your boys really want to see you, so if you agree, she'll bring 'em for a short visit tomorrow-after school- Joe's talking to them now- let me know in the morning, huh? They just wanna know you're ok, you know? They love you-and it's ok if you don't recognize them immediately..so- what do you think about it?"

Amanda said quietly,"I guess it'll be ok- will you be here?" Lee said, nodding,"If you want me to be, I can-but I think your ex will have a big problem with that-.." She replied,"He's my ex- husband- hence, the title- he has no right to tell me who I can have here or not, correct?"

Lee was surprised, and said,"Whatever you want to do is fine- we all just want you well again,ok? Now, I'm gonna go get some shut-eye.." He kissed her hand, and gave it a gentle squeeze, saying,"See you tomorrow-sleep well.."

He left, and Amanda wondered what the day would bring for her. What if she couldn't remember them? She had a lot to think about as she fell asleep..

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Starting Over- Chapter Six

While Amanda slept, it was full of what seemed to be movie clips, with her and this friend from work, Lee Stetson. London, Switzerland..wait- she was in jail?! She was married to..him?! And Dotty, her mother, asking her if she was having an affair?! Amanda woke with sudden fear!

She pressed the call button, and a nurse came in soon after. She said,"Can you call Lee Stetson, please? It's really important that I see him!" The nurse said, looking at her watch,"It's not visiting hours, Mrs. King- it's 4 AM, and-.." Amanda grabbed the nurse's arm, saying icily,"You call him, or I will have your job-do you understand?!" The nurse looked at her patient worriedly, and said, patting her arm, "Ok, but I really need you to relax- it's time anyway, for your medication.."

Amanda let go of the nurse's arm, and said,"No-please! That stuff makes me groggy- I need to talk to Lee.." The nurse checked her vitals, making notes on her chart, and then putting a mild sedative in her IV drip." I'll call Mr. Stetson- just relax, now.." Amanda nodded, and soon, was asleep once more.

At 4:30 AM, Lee arrived, and going to the front desk, said to the nurse,"I was called about Mrs. King- may I see her, please?" The nurse said,"One moment.." She dialled a number, and then said,"Jill, Mr. Stetson is here.. ok, I'll tell him.."

The nurse said,"Have a seat- Jill will be here shortly.." Lee sat for a few minutes, and then Jill came to the lounge, and sat."Mr. Stetson, Mrs. King seemed agitated- she said she'd have my job if I didn't call you.."

Lee sighed."I'm sorry- she's really not that kind of person- maybe she was having another nightmare- this head injury has changed her a little- you didn't tell the doctor, did you?"

Jill shook her head."No- only if she got really violent, would we have to report it- she's asleep now- I've given her a mild sedative- you can sit with her.." They went to Amanda's room, and Lee pulled up the chair and sat near her, holding her hand.

Lee said,"What upset her- do you know?" Jill said,"No- I know how hard this must be for her, and the rest of you- maybe she's remembering something that upset her-anyway, I hope you can help her- it's against regulations to have you in here at this hour, but I'll let them know it was my decision-she said it was important, so-.."

Lee said,"Thanks- if she doesn't wake up in a half-hour, I'll go- I'll stay in the hospital, and just go to get coffee, though, so you can have me paged-please.."

Jill nodded, and left. Lee looked at Amanda, and began stroking the top of her hand he was holding with his thumb, saying,"I'm here, Amanda..I'm here.."

After a while, Lee began to nod off, and that's when Amanda woke up. She tugged at his hand."Lee?" He woke with a start, and yawned."Hey, sleepyhead- how are you?"

Amanda said,"Tired of sleeping- I'm glad they called you- I had a dream a while ago..were we married once?" Lee shook his head,"No.. that is, not in the real sense- remember I told you about our job, and how sometimes, we have to play act to get a case solved?"

Amanda nodded,"Oh, yeah- but were we ever in London, or Switzerland- was I ever in jail?" Lee held up a hand!"Whoa- slow down,ok? Yes, we have traveled quite a bit-even went to Germany-yes, you did go to jail, but someone had slipped you a counterfeit bill, and we cleared you so you could leave- any other questions?"

Amanda shook her head,"No, not really- thanks for coming, though- you made me feel better.." Just then, Jill came in with the doctor. The doctor said,"Mrs. King, how are you feeling?" Amanda said,"Hungry.." They all laughed, and the doctor said,"Well, I think it's time to remove your bandage today- how about it?"

Amanda looked apprehensively at Lee, and shrugged,"Gee, I don't know.." Lee said," Let me call your mom, and she can help out here with your hair.." The doctor nodded, saying,"Ok, Jill, see what they can bring for her to eat, while I go get things ready.."

While Amanda ate, Lee talked to Dotty."Yeah, they want to remove it today..what? Oh, yeah, let me ask her- hold on.." He covered the receiver, and said,"It's up to you, but the kids want to come by- that ok with you?" Amanda sighed,"I guess- my ex too?" Lee nodded, saying, "He's picking them up after school- if it tires you out too much, they'll go, ok?"

Amanda slowly nodded, saying,"I have to try being around them again, right?" Lee said,"Sure- it'll be ok, trust me.." Amanda said,"Ok.." Lee squeezed her hand, and said to Dotty,"Tell Joe to bring them by later- and we'll see you in a while.."

He hung up, and Amanda said,"What about when I go home? I mean, if this doesn't go well-.." Lee put a finger to her lips."Hey- shh- no negative thoughts, ok? They're your family- they love you.."

Dotty came a short time later, and the doctor came into remove the bandage. When he was done, Dotty sighed,"Oh, my.." Amanda said,"What? Do I look that bad?" Dotty shook her head, saying,"No, darling- you just have beautiful hair that will grow back- I was just surprised-that's all.."

Amanda said,"May I see, please?" Jill gave her a mirror, and Amanda was shocked! "What did I look like before?!" Dotty showed her a wallet photo of her and the boys, and Amanda swallowed hard,"Wow.." Then she began to cry! Dotty carefully held her, saying,"It's all right, Panda- I'm here-.."

Amanda said,"What did you call me?" Dotty said carefully,"Panda- I used to call you that when you were a little girl.. I want you to know that even if you don't remember me, I'm always going to be your mother, and I'm always going to love you, ok?"

Amanda nodded,"Ok, thanks- did you bring something for my head?" Dotty said,"Oh, of course.." She went to the chair, and opened the bag she brought, and said,"Now, you could wear a simple bandanna, or this wig- which is as close as I could get to your hair color..want to try it?"

Amanda nodded, and Dotty helped her put it on, and adjusted it for her. Dotty smiled and nodded, looking at it, and then looked at Lee, who also smiled. He said,"It's good- it really is.."

Amanda looked in the mirror, and sighed, saying,"Well, if I ever wondered what I'd look like with short hair, this would be it, right?" Dotty said,"Well, there was a time, not too long ago when you tried something different- a permanent- it wasn't bad, but it just wasn't you.."

Amanda looked at Lee."Really?" Lee nodded,"Yeah- strange time there.." Suddenly, Amanda said,"Dotty, did I have a green top at one time?" Dotty was taken aback at her daughter calling her by her first name, but then said,"Uh, yes-but you gave it away at a rummage sale- why-do you remember something?"

Amanda said,"Yeah- when Lee said strange time, I remembered you saying how that top did strange things to me- I don't know why that popped into my head, but it did.." Dotty kissed her,saying,"Oh, my girl is coming back- I knew it!"

Lee said,"Uh, Dotty- baby steps, ok?" Dotty said,"Right- I was just excited.." Later that afternoon, Dotty helped Amanda get dressed and ready to see her children. Lee said to Amanda,"I've gotta run some errands- I'll be back later- besides, you need time alone with them, ok?"

Amanda nodded, and he left, and Wendy, another nurse, came in,saying,"Mr. King is here with your boys- can I send them in?" Amanda took a deep breath, and let it out, saying,"Yes.."

They all came in slowly, but the boys hung back by Dotty, unsure of how their mother would feel about them. Amanda said,"You're Phillip and Jamie, right?" They nodded, and Amanda said quietly,"Your dad told you what was going on with me, right? Well, you don't have to be afraid to be around me- I won't break.. in fact, you know what? I could use your help.."

Phillip said,"Sure, Mom, what is it?" Amanda winced slightly at him calling her that, but it was something she'd have to get used to.

She said, swallowing hard,"Uh, well- since I don't really remember you boys, maybe you could fill in some blanks for me- do we like to fish together?"

Phillip said,"Well, we go camping a lot, and you're the Bomber's coach.." Amanda looked frightened! "You mean, I've hurt people?" Joe put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, saying,"No, honey- you coach their baseball team- the team name is Bombers.."

Amanda sighed in relief!"Whew- ok.. what else?" Jamie said,"Well, I was a tree in a play, and you made my costume- we had the play in the house- you're- you're a great mom.. when can you come home?"

Amanda said,"It's up to my doctor..um, Phillip, did you ever put sugar in a gas tank?" Phillip yelled,"Yeah! When you were dating that bozo!" Joe barked,"Phillip, that's enough-wait- what?"

Amanda said,"I don't know- it just came to me- he didn't like somebody,so that must have happened- it's ok, Joe- at least I'm remembering a little.." Just then, she had a flash of Lee kissing her as they were in wedding clothes!

Amanda suddenly said,"You know, fellas, I'm getting kind of tired- maybe you could come back in a few days, huh?" Dotty saw she was upset by something, and said,"She's right, boys- she needs her rest- c'mon, I'll treat you to ice cream downstairs-uh, Joe..you coming?"

Joe looked at Amanda carefully, and then said,"Uh, yeah, sure- boys, come say good bye to your mom, ok?" They gave her gentle hugs, and then they all left. Amanda shook her head. What was she thinking? It was all too much. The nurse came in, and said,"Did you have a nice visit with your family?"

Amanda shook her head."I don't know- I've got a bit of a headache- could you keep everyone out 'til tomorrow? I don't want to see anyone for a while-please?" The nurse nodded, and said,"Of course- I'll give you something, and then you can rest, all right?"

Amanda was confused by thoughts of Lee. What were these memories? If they were just friends, then why did she feel like they were more than that? She would have to ask him later about it..

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Starting Over-Chapter Seven

The next morning, Jill came into Amanda's room to check on her, saying,"How are you doing today, Mrs. King?" Amanda said,"Confused- could you call Mr. Stetson? I need to see him..alone.."

Jill nodded,"Sure- but first, the doctor is going to check your progress, to see if maybe you can finally go home.." Amanda looked anxiously at her. "Today?! Oh, I don't think I'm ready to leave today.." Jill said, "Well, that's what he wants to determine.."

Jill checked Amanda's pulse, blood pressure, heart rate, and temperature, making notes in Amanda's chart, and said, putting it back against the footboard of her bed,"Ok, let me go find the doctor, and you can visit with Mr. Stetson- he's right outside- I told him I had to check you first.."

She left, and Lee came in, smiling,"Morning- how ya doing?" Amanda said,"I had on a wedding gown, and you had a white tux, and we got married on an island- I remember palm trees- am I right?"

Lee chuckled, saying,"Good morning, Lee- how are you? Fine- couldn't be better- listen, I need to ask you something.." He looked at Amanda, and she bowed her head ashamedly. She said,"I'm sorry, I just-.." Lee took her hands, and kissed them, and said quietly,"It's ok, really-so, what happened? When did you remember that part?"

Amanda shrugged,"I dunno- I was with the family, and talking with the boys- it went ok-but then, I saw you in a tux, and we were getting married-we, uh, we..-" Lee nodded."Yes, we kissed-but, it was a fake ceremony- we were playing a cover for a case- I put down a phoney name, address- anyway, it wasn't legal, so we're fine.."

Amanda said,"Why do I keep having flashes like this? I feel like I'm in some movie that has no real end.." Lee sat in the chair near her, and held her hand."I think maybe, because you've had to hide me, and the job from your family for a while now.."

Amanda said,"How long has it been, Lee?" He said," About three years now-.." Amanda shook her head,saying,"So, wait.. why am I remembering you, and the job, but not really my family, except comments from Dotty?"

Lee joked,"Well, I've been told that I'm pretty unforgettable.." He laughed, and Amanda tried to hide a smile, but couldn't, saying, "This isn't funny-not at all!"

The doctor came in."Well, good morning- is someone ready to leave this place?" Amanda said quietly,"I don''t think I can- I don't really remember my family yet- I don't want to upset anyone.."

Lee said,"Um, you know, maybe if you went home, it might trigger things- and you won't have to worry about work- you'll have time to recoup- just don't push yourself, ok?" The doctor said,"Let me take a look here.."

Lee held her hand while the doctor examined the surgical area, taking off her wig. After a few minutes, he noted in her chart, and then said," Well, it looks like it's healing quite nicely, and everything else looks good also.. I'm going to go ahead and release you today- on your way out, you can pick up your prescription for pain pills.."

Shaking her hand, he said,"Take care- I'll get your release papers to sign.." Amanda said,"Thank you, Doctor.." He left, and Amanda said,"Could you call my mother, Lee?" Lee nodded,"I'll tell her you have a ride- I'm glad you have something to wear home.."

Amanda nodded,"Yeah, she brought an outfit with the wig- let me go change.." She went to the bathroom, and Lee called Dotty with the good news! Dotty said,"Does she need anything? I could come-.." Lee said,"No- I'll bring her- save you all a trip- are the boys at school now?"

Dotty smiled,"Yes, they just caught the bus- they'll be really happy to have Amanda home- seems like forever since she's been here- is she really all right now?"

Lee nodded, seeing her come out, adjusting her wig." Yeah- she'll have to follow up with her own doctor though, at the end of the week." Dotty nodded,"I'll call Dr. Goodman and set it up, and Lee?.."

Lee said,"Yeah?.." Dotty said,"I want to thank you for being there for her-Joe has to fly back tonight, but he offered to stay longer, if she needed it.." Lee smiled to himself. Some prayers do get answered, he thought! He then remembered that the man was the father of her kids, and that he should dial back his enthusiasm a notch.

He said,"I'll talk to her about it..we'll see you soon.." Hanging up, he said, "Ok- Joe and Dotty will be there when we arrive.." Just then, Jill came in, saying,"Here are your papers, and then, I'll escort you to the curb.." Lee said,"Oh, I forgot to pull the car around- see you in a few minutes.."

Amanda signed, and then Jill dropped the papers off at the desk to be filed, and then brought Amanda to the curb, where Lee was just pulling up. Amanda thanked Jill for everything, as Lee got her settled. Jill smiled,"You're welcome- oh, your pain medication- let me go get it.."

She returned a few minutes later, handing the bag to Amanda, saying, "Take care, Mrs. King..bye.." Lee got them on the road soon, and said,"Oh, by the way, Joe has to fly back tonight unless you want him to stay longer-Dotty wanted me to check with you about it.."

Amanda sighed,"Well, I don't want to keep him away from work- I've kept you away enough as it is.." Lee said,"Hey- I told you- I'm off until you're better, ok? Please don't worry about it.."

A short time later, they arrived at the King home. Lee pulled in the driveway, and parked. Dotty came out, and gave her a small hug."Are you hungry? I'm making pot roast for later- would you like a sandwich? Oh, here, let's get you inside.."

Amanda looked around the front lawn slowly as she and Lee followed Dotty in the house. When Amanda got inside, she wandered slowly from room to room, expecting something, anything to come back to her. Lee held Dotty back from following her, saying,"She has to do this on her own, ok?"

Dotty nodded, saying,"It's just hard watching her- I keep expecting her to have it flood back to her instantly.." Lee smiled, putting an arm around her,"I know.." Dotty said,"What about work for her?" Lee said," May I use the phone? I told our boss I'd let him know when she was home.." Dotty nodded,"Of course- let me fix lunch.."

Amanda came downstairs looking forlorn, carrying a book. Dotty saw her, and said,"What's that, honey?" Amanda said,quietly,"Oh, some photo album- thought I might take a look- see if anything hits me.."

Lee hung up the phone, saying,"Well, Billy and Francine send their best-.." Amanda looked at him blankly, and he said,"Billy Melrose, our boss, and Francine Desmond, his assistant.."

Amanda nodded, and then went back to her photos. She got to her wedding pictures of her and Joe."How old was I here?" Dotty came over to the couch where Amanda sat,"Oh,um, 24- or almost that- you had Phillip the year after, and then Jamie the following year- you looked so beautiful there.."

Amanda said,"You said we lost my father?" Dotty gulped,"Yes, dear- you were away at school when it happened- that's your Uncle Herman taking you down the aisle.." Just then Joe arrived. Coming into the room, he hugged Amanda, and asked,"You doing ok?" Amanda nodded, saying,"I wanted to try looking at our pictures, but so far, nothing.."

Joe said,"Well, it'll come back-give it time- so, do you need me to stay? I don't mind-really.." Amanda said,"No, I'll be ok with everything here- Dotty and the boys are gonna help me, so, I'll be fine- are you gonna say goodbye to them, or do you have to go now?"

Looking at his watch, he said,"I thought I'd talk to them during their lunch period, and then go to the airport- I'd better go now.." He went to hug Dotty, and she said,"Come back soon, you hear?" He nodded, and then shook Lee's hand." Nice to meet you, Lee- call me if she needs anything, ok?"

Lee nodded,"Sure, Joe-safe flight, ok?" Joe nodded, and then looked at Amanda. "Would you like to walk me out, honey?" Amanda shrugged,"Sure.." They went out the front door, and Dotty looked at Lee."Lee, what's wrong?"

He said,"Some of the memories she lost involve the divorce- I just don't like to see her in pain.." Dotty nodded."Oh, don't I know it- it took her a long time to get through that, but at least she had the boys.." Lee smiled,"And you.. don't diminish what role you played here- you mean the world to her- and I know she'll remember that someday.."

Dotty gave him a big hug, and said,"Thank you.." Just then, they saw Amanda come in crying. Dotty said, holding her,"Oh, precious, what is it?" Amanda got a tissue, and said,"That book means nothing , this house.. I want to feel something, but I just can't!" She ran upstairs, and slammed a door!

Dotty shook her head,"My poor baby- what do I do?!" Lee cleared his throat, saying,"Let me try?.." Dotty said, nodding," At least try to get her down here to eat- it might make her feel better.." Lee went up, and Dotty was glad Amanda at least responded to him. They all had a long road ahead of them.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Starting Over- Chapter Eight

With Dotty's permission, Lee went upstairs to talk to Amanda, and tapped on her door. He heard sniffling, and blowing of a nose, and then he heard,"Come in.."

Lee came in, and Amanda was laying on her bed, her back to the door. He sighed, and sat down next to her, and began rubbing her back. He said quietly,"Talk to me- what's wrong?"

Amanda shrugged,and said,"I don't think I should stay here.. it's t-too h-hard- th-they all expect me to be me again, and I don't know w-who that is yet!"

Lee pulled her to him, and held her as she cried,saying,"Look, the doctor said this would take time, right? Your family and friends are going to be there-including yours truly, so please stop worrying, ok?"

Amanda shook her head sadly as she looked at him,"But where do I go for answers? I mean, Dotty and the kids can tell me about stuff, and show me things here, but what about out there?"

Lee suddenly had an idea. Getting up, he pulled her with him, saying,"C'mon- I think we can start the ball rolling here- go fix that pretty face of yours, and let's go downstairs, and talk to your mom.."

Amanda was bewildered! "Wh-why are you talking about sports- balls, I mean?.." Lee kissed her temple, and groaned,"Oh, Amanda..let's go.."

When they got downstairs, Dotty said,"Let's sit down- lunch is all ready.." As they ate, Lee said to Dotty,"I thought maybe, if you didn't mind, I'd take Amanda to some of her old places she went to-see if anything clicks.."

Dotty said,"Well, I was going to take her to our old home, but it was torn down years ago-some new developement is there now-anyway, when you're ready,Amanda, I thought we could go to Vermont, and see your Uncle Herman? And also, Aunt Edna, and your Aunt Lillian-my sister? But there's no rush, dear.."

Amanda nodded as she ate, and without a beat, said,"Mrs. Mc Dragon, too.." Lee and Dotty looked at her, and each other. Lee said,"Mrs. Mc-uh, who?" Dotty said,"Oh, my gosh- the lady at Joe's serority house!"

Amanda said,"What?" Dotty said, getting up,"I'll get your address book- why didn't I think of this sooner?!" Lee started to clear the table, and Dotty said,"Oh, just leave that-I'll get it later.."

Dotty hurried out of the room, and Lee got on the phone. Amanda went over to the couch to look at a photo album after getting it from the book case, and began going through it.

She stared at every photo, wondering if anything would look familiar. She then went upstairs to look through her closet, and found her old school yearbook, and began searching it also. She saw someone from her thoughts of London, and called Lee upstairs! "I found someone-come quick!"

Lee got off the phone and he and Dotty came up to the room, and Amanda said, pointing to a photo,"This is who I saw when I had the flash about London- do either of you know him?"

Dotty smiled,"Oh, yes- that's Conrad Barnhill-you went to high school together- I remember when you had to go to London to look him up- anyone else you recognize?"

Amanda thumbed through the pages, and then saw her own photo. She said to Dotty," What was I wearing?" Dotty looked at the photo, and laughed! "Oh, the latest thing, according to a movie magazine- but your father put his foot down when you wanted to wear false eyelashes- he didn't want his little girl to grow up too fast.."

Amanda smiled, and said,"Hope I remember him someday- did I ever get into real trouble?" Dotty sighed, saying,"Well, you were grounded for almost a month when you hid your best friend, Debbie Ann Mcabie up in our attic- she was running away for some reason or other.."

Lee said,"Hey, how about we hit the road now-get as much time in as we can before you have dinner?" Dotty said,"Would you like to join us, Lee? I was going to order pizza, or Mr. Chicken, or Marvelous Marvin's- and besides, you haven't met our boys yet- they should be home shortly from school.."

Lee was about to politely decline, when a look from Amanda told him she wanted him there. He said,"Sure- I'd love to.. be back soon.."

They got in the car, and Amanda said,"I'm sorry- I should at least ask you if you had other plans.." Lee shrugged,"It's fine- the lady I'd been seeing for a little while? We broke it off recently.."

Amanda said,"That's too bad- no one really seriously, though, right?" Lee looked at her as they drove,thinking to himself,"Just you..and that's all I really need.." Amanda said, "Lee?" He shook his head, saying,"Sorry- did you bring the address book? Let's go through the numbers- Debbie Ann Mccabie?"

Amanda said, poring through the M's."Ah, she's in Richmond, VA- we're not going there, are we?" Lee shook his head."No-but, let me have the phone number- we can set something up for later.."

Amanda gave him the number, and he dialed. When the woman answered, Lee said,"Miss Mccabie? This is a friend of Amanda King's- there's a situation that we need your help with.."

After a rather lengthy conversation, he hung up, and Amanda said,"Can she help?" Lee nodded,"Yeah.. as a matter of fact, she's gonna come here tomorrow.. ok, next one.."

Amanda said,"Kitty Holcomb? I don't see a number or address- that's odd.." Lee said,"Don't worry- I'll have the Agency look her up.. try Conrad Barnhill.."

Amanda gave him the number, and he dialed again. When the person answered, Lee said,"Conrad? It's Lee Stetson.. yeah, it's been a while- look, what are you doing in the next few days? Amanda and I need your help-no..no.. not that kind of help- look, are you gonna be there for the rest of the week?"

Lee groaned. This guy was unbelieveable! "Barnhill! Stop! Now, listen, Amanda had a car accident- she's fine, but she has amnesia at the moment, so she needs you to go over some things about her school time- can you do that?"

Lee sighed, and nodded,"Yeah, yeah, sure- but about Amanda? Ok, great- no, we'll call you.. bye.." He hung up, and said,"Could you please check my glove compartment for extra strength aspirins- two, if I have any.."

Amanda said,"What did he say?" Lee snorted,"Heh- too much.." Lee pulled into a gas station to get his tank filled, and said,"I'm getting a drink- do you want anything?" Amanda said,"Water's fine, thank you.." Lee smiled, and got out. He was back almost immediately, and after Lee paid, they were off again.

As they were on their way back to Amanda's, she said,"Could we pull in there?" Lee saw it was the neighborhood park, and he said,"Sure.." He parked in a space, and they got out, taking their drinks with them. Amanda was drawn by the swings, and went to sit down on one of them.

Lee said,"Take a ride- I'll push.." Amanda, feeling suddenly self conscious, said,"Oh, I- I can't- I mean, aren't I just a little old?" Lee scoffed,"No way- c'mon.."

So Amanda started pumping her legs as Lee pushed her. Soon, he wasn't pushing at all- he stepped back and watched her as he held their water. She was almost up to the clouds, he thought.

Amanda felt like a different person as she swung- she wished she could stay up there forever! But soon, she began getting tired, and slowed down, and stopped finally, with Lee helping her up.

A young boy ran over to them,saying,"Hi, Mrs. KIng! What were you doing up there?!" Lee saw Amanda struggle with an answer, not knowing who the boy was, and said to him,"You're Phillip and Jamie's friend, right?" The boy answered,"Yeah- I'm Billy Barton- well, I gotta go- bye, Mrs. King!.."

He left, and Amanda said,"Can we go home now?" Lee nodded,"Yeah, let's go.." When they got to the house, the boys were playing basketball near the garage- Joe had put up a net so they didn't have to go to the park all the time.

They saw Amanda, and gave her a hug, but she pulled away!"Guys- not now- I'm gonna go lie down, ok- oh, this is Lee Stetson- a friend from work.." Looking at Lee, she said,"Could you tell Dotty that I'm not hungry- I'm just gonna take my pill, and go to bed, ok? Thanks for everything today.."

She went in, and Phillip said,"Why did she call Grandma by her first name? We'd get beaned if we did that!" Lee said,"You guys know she has amnesia? Well, she's uncomfortable calling her mom "Mother", so that's why.."

Jamie said,"Is Mom gonna get better, Mr. Stetson?" Lee smiled,"I hope so-but we're working on things, ok? So, don't be upset if your mom doesn't feel the way she usually does about you yet-trust me, guys, deep down, she loves you, and your grandma- the doctor said it's not going to be easy, and it will take time, so please be patient, ok?"

The boys nodded, and Phillip said,"We told Grandma we wanted pizza..here comes the guy now.." Lee said,"Go tell your grandma I got this-go on now..I'll be right in.."

Soon, Lee came in, and they dug into the delicious pie- they saved some for Amanda, in case she wanted to eat later. When the boys finished, they went to watch TV, while Lee and Dotty cleaned up.

Dotty said,"So, what happened? Amanda just went to her room.. didn't say anything to me.. I don't like to see my baby hurting.."

Lee nodded, and said,"Let's go to the den- I don't want the boys to overhear anything.." When they went in, Dotty shut the door, and said,"Ok-how bad was it?"

Lee said,"We went to Amanda's errand places, but nothing was hitting her, so then we were coming back, and she saw the park, and wanted to go in. She went to the swings, and I pushed her on them, and Dotty, I swear, she was almost like her old self.. she started to get tired, and got off, and then, the boys' friend, Billy Barton came over, and wanted to know what she was doing up there.. she looked lost, trying to remember who this kid was-so I answered some way, and he left, and then she wanted to come home.."

Dotty said,"I think I'll talk to the boys- kids don't realize how they can hurt people's feelings sometimes- especially when they don't understand a situation- I mean, her boys know, but their friends may not.."

Lee said,"They'll be all right, Dotty..look, I'm gonna go see how she is, and then I'm gonna go home-she needs her rest.." Dotty nodded,"Ok, thank you for today- I think you're just what the doctor ordered.."

Lee smiled, and went up. Peeking in her room, he saw she was sound asleep, and curious, looked at her pill bottle. The milligrams said it all- one pill will have her sleep the rest of the night! He gently kissed her forehead, saying,"Sleep well, Amanda- you need it.." He left, and going to Dotty, he said,"We called Debbie- she's coming tomorrow, and her friend, Conrad- we'll see later in the week.."

With that, he said goodbye to the boys, and Dotty, and left. As he drove home that night, he thought about all the things he and Amanda had done together on cases, and all the trips.

He hoped someday soon, she would come back stronger than ever..she had to..

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Starting Over- Chapter Nine

Amanda was having another clip-filled dream. She and Lee were jumping into a lake from..a castle?! Then, she was driving through the streets, unable to slow down, and wound up going through a flower shop?! Then, she and a blonde woman were maids at a party?!

And at one point, she and Lee were tied up in a room with a military man?! Finally, the one she woke up to, was at their fake wedding- when he kissed her! She jumped up out of bed, saying,"Wow!"

Dotty knocked on her door, saying,"Are you awake, dear? Can I come in?" Amanda shook her head. No, she can't tell her mother any of this! She covered quickly, saying,"I'm just getting a shower now, but I'll be down soon, Dotty.."

She quickly grabbed clothes, and ran into the bathroom, and turned on the shower. Stepping in, she let the warm water wash over her as she tried to make sense of her dream. Why doesn't anything make sense to her yet?! Why did that certain kiss throw her into a tailspin?!

She had her head covered, as she wasn't allowed to get her head wet until her doctor examined her in a few days. Cleaning herself, she began having flashes.. of her boys playing baseball, and she was sliding into a base, and hurt her leg?

Then, there was a woman who looked like the blonde from before, but she was brunette, and speaking a different language, and critiquing her house! Then, she was outside a store, and got mugged-Dotty was with her, and they had a lot of bags.

Shaking her head, she finished her shower, and got dressed, and put on her wig- god, she hated this wig, but until her own hair grew back.."Oh, well, hopefully soon, I can get rid of you.."

Coming out of the bathroom, she went into her closet, not knowing why. She liked what she saw- she had good taste in clothes, she thought, and then suddenly saw a black dress, with pearl buttons, and spaghetti straps, and she had a flash- she and Lee were talking about an Embassy party they attended, and Lee admired the dress, because he wanted to get it for a friend of his?!

She was put off by that memory! Just what were they to each other?! He'd been very supportive of her since the accident, but other than them working together, what was the deal? She was going to find out when he got there!

She came downstairs, and Dotty said,"Would you like something to eat? I know you weren't hungry last night, but I could fix something.." The boys were at the table eating, and then there was honking! Dotty said,"Ok, boys, let's go-grab your stuff!"

They were leaving, and Amanda suddenly grabbed them, holding them tight," Have a super day, ok?!" They broke free, saying,"We gotta go! Bye, Mom! Bye, Grandma!" They left, and Amanda went to the couch in tears! "I just wanted to.-.." Dotty went to her, and held her,"I know, honey- don't worry- they know you love them.." Then, Dotty heard a car."Who could that be?"

Amanda said, getting up,"Lee.. I'm gonna get cereal.." Dotty shook her head as she went to let Lee in. When she opened the door, Lee smiled."Hi- how's everybody doing today?" Dotty said,"Hard to tell- come in- want some breakfast?" To which Amanda responded,"Lee doesn't eat breakfast- just has coffee with cream.."

Dotty chuckled,"Oh, now she's scaring me- she knew it was you before you even came to the door-how does she know about your meal preference in the morning?" Lee said,"Well, she's seen me eat stale doughnuts and coffee at work.."Dotty nodded, "Of course.."

The phone rang just then, and Dotty went to answer it, while Lee joined Amanda in the family room, on the couch. He said lightly,"How are you?" Amanda looked in her mother's direction, and then said whispering,"We gotta talk, but not here.."

Amanda and Lee went out to the patio, and she kept going, toward the gazebo. Lee looked through the window. Dotty was still on the phone, so he followed Amanda, and sat on the bench with her, in the gazebo. He said,"So, what's up?"

Amanda took a deep breath, and let it out slowly, and said," I had another dream- I was playing baseball with the kids, and hurt my leg- was that real?" Lee nodded,"Yeah- you came to the office, saying you were showing the hook slide to the boys, and your ankle got messed up- you did have a cast for a bit.. what else?"

Amanda said,"Um, I saw this dress in my closet- black, with pearl buttons, and spaghetti straps- we went to a party, and I wore it- I remembered that you said you wanted one for a friend of yours- was this friend the one you broke up with?"

Lee said slowly,"Wow.. you are remembering a lot more than before- yes.. that was the friend- but I really don't want to get into that right now.. anything else?" Amanda said,"I was driving too fast down a street, and I couldn't brake, and went straight into a flower shop- did-did I hurt anyone?"

Lee sighed, and shook his head,"No, thank god- even you came out of that without a scratch- they did have to remodel- also, another case.." Amanda said,"I was mugged outside a store- Dotty was with me.." Lee nodded,"There was a book with sensitive classified info that your mom had mixed up with some other book.."

Amanda got up, and began pacing, and Lee said,"Hey.. what's the matter now?.." Amanda said,"The wedding we had on that island- where was it?" Lee said,"San Angelo- it was for a case- I was trying to locate a contact on a honeymoon cruise- unfortunately, we had to go through with the ceremony-.."

Amanda said,"Gee, thanks a lot- what do you mean, unfortunately?!" Lee said quickly," I.. I just meant that you and I weren't in that place- you were uncomfortable with the thought of getting married because of your divorce- anyway, we had to go through with it because you were nearly killed the night before-.."

Amanda yelled,"What?!-" Lee covered her mouth with his hand! "Shh- it's ok-you were saved, but that meant that the people we were watching, were onto us, which meant we had to go through with it, to save our cover, which was pretty much blown the next day.."

Amanda gulped."So, how many times have we cheated death with this job?" Lee smiled,"Too many.. uh, you still have something on your mind- I can tell.. so what is it?.."

Amanda said,"We work together, and we're friends, but has anything happened beyond that? I mean, I know for the job we've done things as you've told me, but-?.." Lee said hesitantly,"Well, you're still at a difficult stage here, and I think we'd better just deal with that area later- at least until you're feeling better..um, let's go in- I think Dotty's starting to worry about us.."

Amanda went ahead of Lee, and Lee hung back slightly, thinking of his growing feelings for his partner and friend. He didn't want her to be hurt or confused, but he vowed to himself that he'd tell her how he felt- he never wanted to lose her..

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

Starting Over-Chapter Ten

Lee and Amanda came back from the gazebo, and came into the kitchen, and Dotty said,"There you are.. that was Debbie Ann Mccabie-she was calling from a gas station-she'll be here soon..Amanda, are you still ok about her coming?"

Amanda shrugged,"I don't know, Dotty- I think I'll go lie down- call me when she gets here.." She went up, and Dotty shook her head,saying to Lee, "I wish I knew how to help her.."

Lee nodded,"I know-hey, earlier you said,"Hard to tell"-what did you mean by that?" Dotty said,"Well, she came down before you arrived, and the boys were getting ready to leave for school- well, she hugged them, and they broke away from her-they were going to miss the bus if they didn't hurry-but she was the saddest little thing when they left-maybe she remembered something?"

Lee nodded,"Yeah. She said she hurt her leg- I told her she came to work in a cast, because she was showing the boys a hook slide, and she messed up her ankle."

Dotty said,"Well, that's something at least.." They heard a thump from upstairs! Running up, they saw she wasn't in her room. Then, Dotty tapped Lee, saying,"Attic.."

When they got up there, they saw Amanda surrounded by boxes, and an old crib, and a dresser. She was going through the boxes at a frantic pace, saying angrily," Damn it- I know this stuff- why can't I remember it?!"

Just then, they heard the doorbell. Dotty said,"Oh, gosh-that's Debbie.." Lee said,"Bring her up here- maybe this will jog Amanda's memory.."

Going to Amanda, Lee helped her up, saying,"It's gonna be ok- I promise, huh?" Dotty soon came up, bringing Amanda's friend."Um, Lee Stetson- this is Debbie Ann Mccabie- Debbie, this is Lee-he works with Amanda at IFF.." They shook hands, and then Debbie stepped toward Amanda.

Debbie smiled, saying,"Ok if I give an old pal a hug?" Amanda nodded, and as Debbie held her, Amanda began to cry! Debbie tried to joke,"Hey, we gotta stop meeting like this, A.J."

Lee said,"Who..?" Debbie said, getting tissues out, and giving one to Amanda, and wiping her own eyes,said,"Ah- I'm D.A.-she's A.J.- we liked each others middle names, so we coded each other.." Amanda pulled away from Debbie, and said,"My yearbook's downstairs, if you wanna look.."

She left the attic, and Debbie said,"Whoa- is it really helping, my being here?" Lee sighed,"She's been through a lot already- it's bits and pieces she remembers mostly right now, though.."

Then they heard her yell,"Hey- are you coming down, or what?!" Debbie said,"Wow- she really is lost..lead the way.." Lee let the ladies go ahead of him, and they found Amanda in the family room, with the yearbook, and the photo albums.

Amanda said,"Dotty, are my pills here? I couldn't find them in my bathroom.." Dotty said,"I have them here with the aspirins- Lee..?" He got the water, and Dotty handed him a pill, and he brought both over to Amanda, saying,"Here- you ok?"

Amanda downed the pill and water, nodding, and said finally, "Headache." She sighed, and giving Lee the empty glass, said to Debbie,"You're very nice to come and help me- sorry I'm such a pain.." Debbie touched her arm as she sat next to Amanda."It's ok-I was going to come see you anyway.."

Amanda said,"So, who locked Conrad in the science lab?" They were stunned! Lee said,"You remember that?" Amanda said,"I guess- he wasn't at Picture Day, so..?"

Lee said,"We were on a business trip in London- you told me that he wasn't absent that day- that he had locked himself in.." Debbie howled with laughter! "Oh, I wish I'd been there then!.." Amanda said,"Where were you?"

Debbie said,"We moved in '65- I left before school let out- Dad got a job in Richmond- I've been there ever since.."

Dotty said,"Why don't we eat, and then Amanda can go through the book with you.." They ate, and at one point, Amanda got up, and went to the back yard, without finishing her sandwich.

Dotty muttered in frustration,"Oh, that girl- I swear! She does that all the time-what's so fascinating about that back yard?!"

Lee got up, patting Dotty's shoulder,"It's ok- I'll go.." Debbie said,"I'd like to know myself.." They headed outside, and found Amanda just finishing a split! Then she got up, and went a did a cartwheel! Debbie hugged her! "Wow- you're still in great shape! Just came to you?"

Amanda nodded,"I don't know why- the flashes come like clips of a movie.." Lee smiled, winking at her,"You'd look a whole lot better in your skirt!.."

Amanda playfully hit his arm, saying,"He only says that because he was a football player..and why can't you trust a cheerleader?"

Lee realized she was remembering the Mongoose case, where Conrad had said that very thing to her! He tried to act confused."I'm sorry- what?.."

Amanda said to Debbie,"Dotty said I hid you in our attic one time when you ran away- was your dad mad like she said mine was?" Debbie said, sighing, "Yeah, he was- I got the same sentence you did- I-I miss him.."

Dotty had been by the door, listening, and said," Dear, Debbie's father died last year.." Amanda said,"I'm so sorry..here, let's go look at the yearbook.."

After a few more hours, Debbie said,"Well, I'm sorry I can't stay longer, but my school is having a benefit tomorrow- I really have to go.." Amanda went out to the car with Debbie.

She said,"I wish everything could already be normal- I feel like you wasted a trip today.." Debbie hugged her, saying "Are you kidding?! This is just what we both needed, kiddo- but don't worry- you can call me anytime- I left my number with Dotty, ok?"

Hugging Amanda again, saying," I love you, A. J..." Debbie got in her car, and as she drove away, Amanda waved, and then sat down, feeling like everything had crashed around her!

She sobbed, feeling like she had nothing left! Lee came out, and wordlessly scooped her up, and carried her into the house- Dotty held the door open, and Lee brought Amanda upstairs.

Laying her on the bed, he held her until she fell asleep. Getting up finally, he went downstairs, and said to Dotty,"I'm gonna go too- she needs to rest now.." He turned to leave, and Dotty said,"Lee?" He turned back to her."Yeah?"

Dotty said,"Would it help if you brought her back to work? I mean, the typing, and filing alone would get her mind on something else for a while-oh, but she has her check-up in the morning-.." Lee nodded."Yeah- tell you what- I'll pick her up at the doctor's when she's finished, and bring her to the office- might be just what she needs at this point.."

Lee hugged her and left. Getting into his car, he dialled Billy." Billy, I'm bringing Amanda in tomorrow- no, she only has bits and pieces so far, but I'm hoping the more she's keeping busy..yeah, yeah, ok- thanks..see you tomorrow.."

The fact that she remembered yet another case kept Lee hopeful that the rest would come back soon as well..

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Starting Over-Chapter Eleven

Dr. Goodman was finishing up with Amanda, and said,"Everything looks good here- your head is healing as it should-do you have any questions for me before you go?"

Amanda said,"Yes-about my headaches- why am I getting them so often? I thought the pain pills were supposed to take care of that.."

The doctor said,"Well, your head went through a trauma, and it will take time for it to straighten itself out..when you have flashes of memory, does the pain increase or lessen? I ask, because things in the brain get jumbled about, and they're not easily put back into place as quickly as we'd like, which is why we tell patients with head injuries not to push themselves- let things come when they can.."

Amanda nodded,"So, I will get better, but not really when I want to?" Just then, she had a flash of her and Lee on the top of a building, and the only escape was to get on a wrecking ball? Then, she had a flash of Lee and her in a resort, having dinner, and he was overly attentive to her, and she had on a wedding ring?

Dr. Goodman noticed Amanda shaking her head furiously, and said,"Are you all right? Do you need to lie down for a bit?" Amanda said, covering,"No, I'm fine- thank you ,Dr. Goodman- I have a friend picking me up to go to work- that is all right, isn't it- to go back to work?"

The doctor said,"Of course, but if you feel it's too much too soon during the day, then I say, to cut your day short-only work what you're able to-they should understand.."

Amanda came into the waiting area, and Lee was there. He said,"How'd it go?" Amanda said. shrugging,"Ok-can we go now?"

As Lee drove them to the office, he would glance at Amanda every so often, and, finally, not able to stand the silence any longer, said,"Ok- something's wrong-what is it?"

Amanda said,"I don't know what you mean- I'm fine-so, what kind of stuff am I going to file today?"

With that, Lee pulled into Rock Creek Park, which wasn't too far from the Agency, and stopped. Amanda said, looking at him,"What's the matter? Why did we come here?"

Lee said quietly,"Something is bothering you that you don't want to share with me- I don't want to push here, but I gotta say this.. I've been with you this entire time, from the time you went into the hospital, 'til now. I've told you I would help you in any way I can, but it seems like you're pulling away from me-have I said or done something to make you uncomfortable, or make you not trust me any more-?"

Amanda said,"How do you feel about me? And please tell me the truth- I'm trying to remember a lot of things here, and when I remember the two of us, it's confusing mostly, because I don't know what's real, and what isn't. My most recent flashes were just now in the doctor's office, and I couldn't tell him what went through my mind, so I suggest you talk to me-please?"

Lee slowly nodded, and called Billy. "Billy, sorry to do this, but it looks like Amanda isn't up to work today- we'll try again tomorrow, ok? Yeah, ok, thanks..bye.."

Putting the car in reverse, he pulled out of the park, and headed for Georgetown- to his place. When he parked, they got out, and Amanda said,"Where are we?"

Lee said,"My apartment building- I'm on the third floor..c'mon.." He let them in, and he said, going to his bar,"Want a drink?" Amanda said, looking at her watch,"Um, isn't it way too early-?" Lee said, pouring himself a drink, "Not for me, it isn't-you wanted to talk-ladies first-what were your flashes?!"

Amanda sat on the sofa, and sighed,"I'm sorry- I didn't mean to upset you.." Lee sucked down the scotch he poured, and slammed the glass down on the bar! "I'm not-!.." He took a deep breath, and letting it out slowly, he calmed down a bit, saying,"I'm- I'm sorry- I guess this whole thing's bothered me more than I've been able to admit.."

Amanda got up, taking her purse, and said,"I'll see myself out, Lee- and don't worry about getting me to work tomorrow- I'll get a cab.."

But as she got to the door, Lee said," I love you.." Amanda was floored! She turned around, and stammered,"W-what? What did you say?!"

Lee came slowly towards her, and nodded,"Yeah, a day for miracles, right? This guy, this loner of loners, who doesn't let anyone get close enough to him in case he gets hurt, or he hurts her, has actually fallen for someone- I can't believe it either.."

Taking her hand, he said,"Let's sit down.." They sat on the sofa, and Amanda said,"Wow.." Lee said,"Yeah-uh, look, I know you're dealing with your memory loss, and all, but I was afraid that if I didn't say something to you right here, right now, that I probably wouldn't get another chance.. see you've gone through this before, only the last time, you only forgot me and the Agency- not your family.."

Amanda said slowly, "What do we do now?" Lee sighed,"We will go at your pace- whatever you're comfortable with, ok? I didn't spill my guts here to force you to feel something that you're not ready for.."

He continued, saying,"Let's do this- from now on, if you have a flash that involves us, you talk to me-day or night. Your mom thinks we just work together, and that we're friends- let's let her keep thinking that..for now at least, and hey, your family already likes me, so that's a bonus in my book.."

Lee looked at Amanda and said,"So. what do you think?" Amanda got up, letting go of his hand, and said,"I think I'd better go home- I have an awful lot to think about, and I'm still very confused..I'm not pushing you away, but I think I need some time to myself to try to figure things out, ok?"

Lee was shaken, but he understood." Take as much time as you need- call me when you're ready.." He gently hugged her, and called a cab for her, and she left shortly after. It was either the bravest move, or the stupidest. Either way, he'd find out soon enough..

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

Starting Over-Chapter Twelve

Dotty heard Amanda come through the front door, and met her at the stairs."You're home early-you didn't go to work after all?" Amanda shook her head."I wasn't up to it- I-I told Lee to go ahead without me- I had a cab bring me home- I'm gonna go lie down.."She headed up to her bedroom, closing the door.

Dotty immediately called Lee."What happened this morning? She wanted to try, didn't she?" Lee nodded."Yeah- I guess she's afraid of how people will treat her if she doesn't remember them- I told her it wouldn't matter, but she's still self-conscious about it- I told her to call me in the morning if she wanted to try again..um, I gotta go- let me know if you need anything,ok?"

Dotty nodded,"I will- thanks again, Lee..bye.." They hung up, and Lee began to feel the way Amanda used to about lying- he hated it when it came to her mother, but he couldn't tell her how he felt about Amanda yet.

Meanwhile, Amanda was up in her room, wondering when this confusion would end! Now Lee has professed his feelings for her- she did care about him, and he's been there every step of the way, but she knew it couldn't go on this way!

She wanted her old life back- could she handle whatever came next?! She pulled a photo out of her parents, and sighed. Dotty was certainly willing to be there as well. There was a knock on the door."Amanda? Can I come in?"

Amanda said, wiping a tear away,"Yes, c'mon in.." Dotty came in, and saw the photo, and smiled."That was the year before Carl died- oh, you were the apple of his eye, darling- listen, today was the day he and I met- would you like to go with me to the cemetery? I like to go on his birthday, and holidays-helps to keep him close.."Amanda smiled,"That's nice- I know you must miss him terribly.."

Dotty gave her a hug, and said,"Well, I have you, and my grandsons-that helps.." Amanda suddenly had a flash- of a cabin, and she and Lee were there when it was snowing, and they were singing Silent Night? Then, she was telling Dotty to take the boys and leave town, because of a bomb threat?

Suddenly, she said,"Did he ever have a cabin in the woods?" Dotty said, nodding,"Yes- in West Virginia- you went with him for weekends to fish- he and his friend Hunter Conrad taught you a lot about camping and such, and you showed me when you started volunteering for the Junior Trailblazers-why?"

Amanda went to get a suitcase, and began packing items quickly, saying,"I just remembered some things, and I want to check them out-can you give me directions?"

Dotty said,"I could go with you?.." But Amanda said,"No- it's ok-I have to do this on my own-I'll go to the bus station, and figure out the rest.." Hugging her, she said,"Thanks for worrying, though- I'll be ok.."

When Amanda got her cab and left, Dotty called Lee, and said,"Amanda's on her way to West Virginia-let me explain.." When she finished telling Lee what was going on, he said,"Don't worry- I'll find her- I'm leaving right now- maybe I can stop her.."

Hanging up, Lee shook his head."God, Amanda- just talk to me-you don't have to run away!" He got on the phone with Billy."I'm heading to West Virginia-for some reason, Amanda's going there because of her dad.." Billy said,"Need a team?"

Lee said,"No, I'm bringing stuff-provisions.. now, here's the area we'll most likely be in-in case we're not back for a few days.."

Billy wrote everything down, and nodded, saying,"You think she's remembered more about the job?" Lee said,"Yeah, but she can't tell Dotty, so she asked where her dad's cabin used to be.."

Billy said,"This Hunter Conrad- he'd be able to tell her about her dad-.." Lee said,"Billy- her mom can tell her everything! No, something else is bothering her- I can feel it..look, I gotta go.."

Hanging up, he packed and headed on the road, hoping he'd find her before dark..

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

Starting Over-Chapter Thirteen

Lee thought the only place Amanda could go by cab would be the Metro station, and then get directions from there. While driving, he called Billy, and said,"Wanna check on Metro? Some of our guys might be able to spot her, if they haven't already..but just tell them not to approach her-just let you know, and then I'll know how to find her before she gets on.."

Billy said,"Ok..call you back.." As Lee parked in the lot at Metro, Billy called back."Scarecrow, they spotted her at the north end, getting her ticket." Lee said,"Great- thanks, Billy- talk to you later.."

He hung up, and got out, locking his car, noting that he had his keys. Amanda was always helpful in that way, taking them out of the ignition, so he wouldn't leave them in the car. She knew at the time, that he wasn't the type of person to have a wire hanger to unlock his car.

They had joked about it at one time, with Amanda teasing him, saying,"Heaven forbid, you should do things like a normal person!" Then Lee would go into how his car was special, that it required a certain handling, and Amanda would roll her eyes at him, and shake her head saying,"Yeah..right- you call your special car person, and viola'-they've unlocked it from the dealership!"

They'd share a laugh, and Lee would say,"You know,I could get you a deal for your car.." Amanda nodding, would say,"I couldn't afford the premiums-thanks anyway.." Then Lee would smile, wink at her, saying,"Great deal at my rates.." Amanda gave a snort,"Really? Such as..?"

Then Lee stepped closer, as she leaned against the car, and his his hands would be on her waist, and he clears his throat, saying,"I recall when you offered Spencer's as a deal breaker for a certain negative..um, how about a tie breaker? I'll throw in Emelio's, and we'll compare ambiances, and just take it from there.."

Amanda gave a smile that was just for him, saying,"What night wouild this be?" Lee chuckled,"Uh, I-I don't really know, because I have this partner who is very busy with her family, and-.."

Amanda said, letting Lee wrap his arms around her gently then,"Well, I have an "in" with the lady, so just what night?" Lee chuckled, and said,"I have a feeling that no matter what night I suggest, she'd be open to it, right?" Amanda nodded, saying,"See how easy that was?"

Lee shook his head at the memory, chuckling. He hoped he'd have that time with her again, that she'd remember all that stuff. He quickly headed for the north end of Metro.

Getting there, he recognized one of the tails from the Agency, who spotted him, and gestured to the ticket area where Amanda was standing, asking questions to one of the workers there.

Lee nodded to the tail, signalling him and the others to leave. He came up to Amanda, surprising her, and said,"You won't need to get a ticket- c'mon.." As they walked back to the parking area, Amanda stopped and said,"Lee, you've already done too much-besides, how did you know where I was?"

Lee said,"Dotty called just after you left- she was worried, ok? Besides, you don't have a clear recollection of the cabin, do you?" Amanda said,"No, but Dotty gave me directions.. I just wanted to see it- maybe I'd remember after all, you know?"

Lee sighed, and nodded,"Yeah, I get it-but something must have come to you-otherwise, you wouldn't be here- what was it?"

Amanda sighed as they got into the car, and said,"Well- you and I were in a cabin in the woods- I don't know where, though, and there were two-no, three men there also, and it was winter-snowy- and we were all singing "Silent Night"-why?"

Lee smiled as he drove out of the Metro area,and said,"It was Christmas Eve- two months after we met, and it was a simple case that turned sour, and kept us there most of the night- there was an American, and two Russian agents there as well- some gunfire was exchanged- I caught a bullet, and so did one of the Russians..you were instrumental in keeping things calm there.."

Amanda looked scared."What did I do?" Lee gave her a lopsided grin, and said,"Well, you not only called a truce, you kept us full of beans, and coffee.."

Amanda shook her head, saying,"I did what?" Lee patted her hand, saying,"That's all they had in the cabin- I can't stand beans, but I didn't mind the vodka.."

Amanda said," Let me guess- one of the Russians had that?" Lee smiled,"Oh,yeah- medicinal purposes,of course..even you had it, which led into our chorus of "Silent Night.."

Amanda said quietly," I wasn't drunk, was I?" Lee shrugged,"Maybe a little, but then, like I said, there wasn't a lot of food, and we were out of there before dawn- someone took me to the hospital, and you home- you got to be with your kids after all on Christmas Day.."

Amanda shook her head as Lee drove on. She said,"Thank you for coming to get me- I was confused as it was,trying to figure out how to get to the cabin anyway.."

Lee got off at an exit that led to Georgetown, saying,"I want to talk to you, if that's ok? You can call Dotty, and tell her you're with me.."

They pulled into Lee's apartment complex, and went up in the elevator to his place, and he let them in, and Amanda went to call Dotty."Hi- it's me-yeah, I'm fine- I'm at Lee's place- he found me at the Metro station- I'll be home in a while..ok, yeah, you too- bye.."

Lee smiled at her as she hung up."She was worried, right?" Amanda shrugged,"I guess-but as soon as I told her I was with you, she relaxed, I think.. so, what did you wanna talk about?"

Lee took her hand, leading her to the couch."Let's sit down, huh?" They sat, and Lee said,"Ok, I wanted to start off by saying how glad I am that you're all right. I also want you to come to me any time if memories like the cabin one come up- Amanda, I don't want things to be awkward between us because of what I said about my feelings for you- you really don't have to be afraid of me, ok?"

Amanda nodded slowly, and said,"Does Dotty know about the job?" Lee shook his head,"All she knows is that we work for IFF- it's a cover for the Agency, like I said before- has she been asking questions?"

Amanda said,"Not really- I think she's hurt,though, that I don't call her Mother- I'm just not there yet, you know?"

Lee said,"She understands- don't worry-hey, you wanna grab some lunch, and I'll take you home?" Amanda nodded, and he took her to Milo's for chili dogs, which she loved. She said when they were finished,"I wish I could remember Alabam, though.."

Lee smiled,"You just remembered another case involving Alabam Airport- pretty soon, everything will come back- trust me..let's go.."

When they got back to her house, her mother left a note, saying she was going shopping with a friend, and not to worry, that she would be back before dinner, and that the boys would be staying at a friend's house that night.

Amanda went to sit on the couch, and Lee looked at her concerned."You ok?" Amanda said,"I've just got a headache- I'm sorry- I'm gonna lie down for a while- do you mind?"

Lee said,"No, it's fine- I gotta go anyway- you take care,ok? Call me if you need anything.." He left, and Amanda went up to her room to lay down on her bed, after taking some aspirins, and soon fell asleep.

Meanwhile, on his way back home, Lee called Billy, saying that Amanda was still getting headaches, but seemed to be remembering more each day. Billy thought maybe there was a connection between the headaches and the memory flashes, and that she should get checked out by Dr. Scardelli. Lee said,"Sure- I'll go over it with her-see what she thinks.."

Could this be a positive sign that Amanda was on her way to getting her life back? Lee prayed for some good news on that front, but he would deal with it tomorrow..

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

Starting Over-Chapter Fourteen

The next morning, Amanda was asleep, and in several different points in her life. The scenes played out like in a movie. The first one, she was a young girl dancing with Carl West, her father, around the living room, to the tune of a Frank Sinatra song,"That's Life", and his animations of singing like Frank made her and her mother Dotty West, laugh hysterically.

The next one, she and her mother were standing at a cemetery, with various friends and relatives, as they buried him. She and her mother wept openly-it was the darkest day in their lives.

Next, she was in a wedding gown, being brought down the aisle by her mother, to marry Joseph King, and she wished her father could've met Joe- she thought he would've approved.

The next one, she and Joe had signed the divorce papers, and it was over. He got the last of his things out of the Maplewood house that day, saying once again, how sorry he was, but that he would always love her. As he pulled out of the driveway, he waved goodbye to the boys, who just couldn't understand yet what happened, and why their dad was leaving.

As Amanda closed that front door, she realized that she was closing the chapter on that part of her life, and decided to start a new chapter.

The new chapter began as she met Dean McGuire, a local weatherman in town, several weeks after her divorce became final. They began having lunches, then dinners, even at the house-her mother warmed up to him, while the kids did not- especially Phillip. When he realized that Dean may not be going anywhere for a while, he put sugar in Dean's gas tank-a tip from one of his friends. Several hundred dollars later, it was fixed, but Amanda then knew she had a problem,so back to therapy the family went.

The next scene played out in clips- she and Lee at a train station, in a helicopter, coming out of a cabin as it blew up! Then the scenes stopped, and she was scared, and began sobbing for her mother! Moaning fitfully, she tossed and turned in her bed, and finally sat up, as Dotty came in quickly!"Darling, It's all right- I'm here now.." She held Amanda, and rocked her in her arms on the bed, as Amanda cried, saying,"Mother, what's happening?! I don't know what's going on-help me!.."

Dotty reached for the phone on the nightstand, seeing Lee's number, and dialed. Lee answered,"Hello?" Dotty said in a soft tone,"Lee, I need help with Amanda- could you come over? I'm calling Dr. Goodman now- maybe he can see her in a while.."

Lee without hesitation, said,"I'll be right there- tell her it's gonna be ok.." He hung up, and then dialed BIlly."I think Amanda's breaking- tell Scardelli I'll bring her in today-Dotty's calling her family doctor right now- maybe she'll be calm later on today-talk to you later when I know what's going on.." He hung up, got dressed, and went to Amanda's.

When he arrived, Dotty let him in, saying," I can't get her dressed- she's afraid of everything now-Dr. Goodman said she's probably starting to remember everything at once, and it's too taxing for her- he called in a prescription for a mild sedative, but I have to go get it-.."

Lee stopped her, saying,"It's ok- I'll stay here, and see if I can get her up and around- you go ahead.." Dotty hugged him, saying,"Are you sure? I won't be long.." Lee said,"Go, we'll be fine.."

Dotty went to the drugstore around the corner, while Lee went upstairs to check on Amanda. He knocked gently on her door."Amanda-may I come in?" Amanda slowly opened the door, and let him in, nodding.

They sat on the bed, and Lee gently took her hand, stroking the top of it with his thumb. Amanda then laid down, her head in Lee's lap. He looked down at her, and softly said,"You ok? What happened?"

Amanda shrugged sadly, saying, "I don't know- I've got these headaches that won't leave, and a whole bunch of memories jumbling around in my head that don't make sense to me yet- I- I'm afraid to sleep any more- can you help me?"

Lee bent his head down, and kissed her forehead, saying gently,"You bet I will, but first, let's get you up and dressed-you really need to eat some breakfast, ok? Your mom will be back soon with some medicine for you.."

Amanda sighed,"Mother.. I've caused so much trouble for her.." Lee sat Amanda up, and said,"Amanda, when did you remember her?" Amanda looked at him funny."What? I've always remembered her-she's my mother.."

Lee nodded,"Yes, but ever since your car accident, your memory's been screwed up, and you've been calling her Dotty- we've been trying to help you get better for a while now, and calling her "Mother" may be the first step to doing that..c'mon, go get a shower, and I'll fix something for you, ok?"

Amanda shook her head,"Ok, I'll meet you down there- I don't know what we have in the fridge, but-.." Lee said,"Just go, please?"

As Amanda showered, Lee went to the kitchen to make one of his omelets he hoped she would like. As he was in the middle of preparing, Dotty came in the front door,"I'm back.." Lee said,"I'm fixing breakfast-would you like anything?"

Dotty nodded,"Yes, thank you- what you're making looks wonderful.." Lee smiled,"Ok, three omelets.." Dotty said,"How's my girl?"

Lee said,"I got her to clean up, and get dressed- she'll be down soon- got her meds?" Dotty nodded, showing him the bag, and taking out the bottle."She is to take one twice a day with food- I guess now, and then one at dinner?"

Lee looked at the milligrams, and nodded."Good idea.." Then Amanda came into the kitchen, and said slowly,"Morning, Mother.."

Dotty went to hug her! "Oh, my precious girl! I have missed you calling me that- how are you? Do you need anything? Here, let's get you at the table.."

Amanda said,"Mother, please- I'm all right-except for these headaches.." Lee was dishing up the plates, and Dotty went to pour juice for Amanda, and got her a pill, and brought it over to her.

Amanda said,"Is this for my headaches?" Dotty said,"No, darling- Dr. Goodman thought it would relax you while you're trying to get better- we'll go in a while to see him, ok?"

Lee brought the plates over, while Dotty got the silverware and napkins, and they began eating. Amanda said,"Mother, where are the boys?" Dotty said,"They went to a sleepover last night, and now they're in school- why?"

Amanda shook her head, saying,"I feel like I lost track of them a long time ago- god,I'm so tired.." Lee squeezed her hand, saying,"You're getting closer to being healthy again- don't worry about it so much, ok? I thought maybe later, we could stop by the office, and see our boss? Would you be up for that?"

Amanda nodded, taking her pill and drinking her juice." Yeah- I'll bet Mr. Melrose is real upset that I've been gone so long- Francine? Not so much.."

Dotty said, looking at them,"Um, your boss and co-worker?" Lee said,"Yeah- he's our IFF producer, and she's associate producer-Amanda and I are associate directors there.."

Dotty nodded,"Oh, of course- filmmakers have a lot of people running things, don't they?" Lee nodded,"Yeah, photographers, and location scouters too.."

Looking at his watch, Lee said,"Dotty, when were you gonna take Amanda to her doctor?" Dotty said,"Well, pretty soon- are you finished, Amanda? He said he'd squeeze us in before lunch.."

Amanda downed her juice, and wiped her mouth, and got up."Sure-let's go.." They were back within a couple of hours. Lee had straightened up the kitchen, and checked in with Billy, saying he and Amanda would be there shortly.

Dotty shook her head at Lee,"You didn't have to do that.." Lee smiled,"No trouble at all.." Looking at Amanda, he said,"You ready?" Amanda sighed,"As I'll ever be.."

When they arrived at the Agency, Lee said, "Praying mantis.." Mrs. Marston gave them both their ID's, and they took the elevator down to the office.

Lee knew how nervous Amanda would be there, so he helped her with her badge, and squeezed her hand, saying,"We work with these people, and they're our friends, too, ok?"

Amanda nodded, as they emerged from the elevator," Hope I do ok here.." Billy approached them, and said to Amanda,"How are you feeling, dear?" Amanda shrugged,"Oh, good and bad days here and there-so far today, not bad.." Lee chuckled,"Nerves.."

Billy nodded, and then they saw Francine coming out of the conference room with Fred Fielder. She came to Billy's side, engrossed in the file she was holding, and said to Billy,"Here is the latest stats on that Abrams character Fred picked up at the airport-.."

Billy shook his head,"Francine-not now-look who's come to pay us a visit?" Francine looked up, and said,"Oh-sorry- nice to see you, Amanda-you doing better?"

Amanda was about to respond, when Francine got distracted, seeing Fred, and went after him, yelling,"Hey, you owe me 5 big ones for that lunch, pal!"

Billy and Lee shook their heads as she left, and Billy said,"You caught her on an off morning-she'll be better next time.."

Amanda rubbed her arms, suddenly, and Lee said,"What's the matter? You cold?" Amanda nodded,"Yeah, from the arctic wind that just came through here..whew.."

Lee and Billy both laughed at that. Lee then said,"Well, why don't we go see our Agency doctor now, and see if he can't help you, huh?"

After a thorough exam, Dr. Scardelli said,"She's fine physically, just the memory- her doctor's right- let things come back naturally.."

So, after Lee gave her a tour of the Agency, Amanda grew tired, so he took her home, and she went to take a nap.

Dotty said,"Any luck at your office? Did she remember anything yet?" Lee shook his head,"No, nothing yet- I'm gonna go now- tell her I'll talk to her later, hmm?"

Driving home, he dialed Emily Farnsworth. She answered, and he said,"Hi- any chance you could come to D.C. for a visit?"

Lee explained about Amanda's accident, and her memory loss, and said,"Even if she doesn't remember you right away, she could really use another friend around here.. you will?! Oh, that's great, Emily-yeah, ok.. see you soon..bye.."

Lee hung up as he pulled into his complex. Getting into his apartment, he yawned, and said,"Maybe I could use a nap- it's been one hell of a day.."

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Starting Over-Chapter Fifteen

Lee got to Dulles to meet Emily's plane at 6 pm. As they collected her bags, Lee recounted to Emily about Amanda's flashes of memory, and her headaches, and dreams/nightmares.

They got to Lee's car, and left the airport, on the way to Arlington. Lee said,"I called Dotty- she thought it would be nice if we had dinner with them.." Emily shook her head,"I do hope things work out for Amanda-she's been a good friend.." Lee nodded. "One of the best.."

Emily said,"Does she remember working with you at all?" Lee sighed,"Bits and pieces- you'll be able to tell when things start to overwhelm her, though, so we'll try it slow. After the previous night's sleep, she finally remembered her mother- started calling her that again, instead of Dotty."

Emily said,"Her dreams-what do they show her,really?" Lee said,"Well, basically clips of her actual life, but she says she can't make sense of anything-it frustrates her beyond belief, but I told her to try and be patient- that she would get better.."

Emily said,"How are her children handling it?" Lee shrugged,"They're ok, I guess- they tell her things if she asks, but they know not to push her- at least Dotty's there to help them.."

They arrived at Amanda's, and Dotty let them in, saying,"Amanda's upstairs-.." Just then, Jamie came down the stairs, and said,"I don't know what happened, but Mom's crying, Grandma!" Dotty shook her head,"Oh, dear.. well, did you boys say something to upset her? I told you to leave her be, that she was resting, didn't I?"

Jamie said,"Phillip started it- I didn't!" Dotty said tersely,"You go get your brother, and get washed up for dinner, now, young man- I don't want to hear another word!"

With that, Jamie went up the stairs, yelling,"Hey, doofus- you're gonna get it now!" Then there was a scuffle, and then slamming of a door!

Emily looked worried, saying,"Maybe this wasn't a good idea-my coming over tonight, that is?.." Dotty shook her head,"No, it's fine- I mean, the boys are usually well-behaved, it's just, well, with Amanda and her headaches.."

Lee looked at Dotty, concerned."Are they getting worse?" Dotty said,"No, but she gets them more often now than not-oh, and I wanted tonight to be nice for all of us.."

Emily patted Dotty's hand."It's all right, dear-if you don't mind, maybe I could try to see her? Lee, what do you think?"

Lee shrugged,"As the saying goes,"It can't hurt.." So, Emily made her way upstairs, and knocked gently on Amanda's door, saying,"Amanda? Dear, you may not remember me, but it's Emily Farnsworth..may I come in?"

Amanda opened the door, and Emily could tell Amanda was in emotional pain, and came in, closing the door. They sat on the bed, and Emily said,"I was so sorry to hear of your accident-Lee told me what's been happening of late- would it help if you talked to me?"

Amanda sighed, wiping her face, and blowing her nose, and said finally,"I guess what's bothering me is that I'm not remembering fast enough for people..wait.. do you work with us, too?"

Emily smiled, and said,"On occasion,dear-in fact, twice now, you've been helpful to Lee and myself on cases.." Amanda looked at her strangely, and said,"Where's your bun?"

Emily shook her head, and then realized that Amanda remembered something! She opened the door, and called Lee upstairs. He came quickly, saying,"What's wrong?"

Emily said,"You mean, what's right,dear- Amanda remembered when I had a wig here.." She took Amanda's hand, saying,"We had to use your dining room for a case, and I play acted, being an interigator-went off without a hitch-that is, until your family came home, and found gray walls.." Emily and Lee chuckled at that, and Amanda snapped her fingers at Lee, saying,"That ugly painting of what's-his-name!.."

Lee patted her shoulder,"You are coming back-just remember-you still can't tell your family our Agency stuff, ok? Now, can we go eat?"

Amanda nodded, and went to wash her face, and they headed down, where, in the dining room, the boys were holding out chairs for their mother, and Emily.

Emily admired their manners, saying,"Well, you certainly have two wonderful young men here-Dotty, you and Amanda are to be commended for how grown-up they're being.." She and Amanda sat, and thanked them, and Dotty sighed.

Amanda said,"What is it, Mother?" Dotty said,"I love hearing you call me that again, dear- but there's something these boys have to say-right, fellas?"

Phillip cleared his throat, and said,"Uh, yeah, Mom- we're sorry for making you cry before- we won't do it again.." Then Jamie spoke. "Yeah, Mom-please don't hate us.."

Amanda swallowed hard, and gulped, pushing back her chair, and said,"C'mere, boys.." They came to her side with apprehension, not knowing what she would say. But all she said, was,"Boys, I may not remember everything about you yet, but I do know this- there is nothing on God's green earth that could ever make me hate you-he blessed this family when you came along, ok? Now, give me a hug, so we can finally eat!"

They held each other tight, and she kissed them both, and said,"Ok, now, scoot! Go on!" The meal went without incident.

Later, when the boys went upstairs to bed, and Dotty had gone with them, Amanda went to make tea, and brought everything into the family room when it was ready for she and Lee and Emily. As they sat, Amanda said,"Lee, you've been quiet tonight- anything wrong?"

Lee shook his head,"No- just got a lot on my mind- I'm ok, though.." Amanda said,"When I first saw Emily earlier, I had a flash of someone with her- not you-does the name Retsig ring a bell?"

Lee shook his head. "I'm afraid that man was not with a case that Emily helped us with-in fact, it all had to do with a chicken sandwich that you ate for lunch one day.."

He related the story of how Amanda was poisoned, and that it was meant for him. Amanda shuddered,"Well, I'm remembering cases, but kind of mixing them up, huh?" Lee patted her shoulder."It's ok- you're making progress, and that's great..anything else?"

Amanda said,"Yeah- what's with Francine? Is she always that frosty?" Lee chuckled,"It takes a while, but eventually, you get used to her-she is a friend, trust me on that one.."

Amanda then went to the closet in the hall, and brought out a sketch pad, saying,"I found this, and didn't know if you had given this to me, or Emily-do you draw, Lee?"

Lee nodded toward Emily. "No, that honor goes to our esteemed colleague, here-we discovered on a case in Germany about Emily's talent-helped us solved it.."

Suddenly, Amanda turned ashen, and sat down. Emily took her hand."What is it, dear? Are you all right?!" Lee came over to her side as well."What is it?" Amanda shook her head.

She said," There was a blond woman.. she -she was dead, wasn't she, Lee?" Lee knelt down in front of her, and slowly nodded."Yeah.. we found her in the cafe she worked in- she warned Emily about not going to the castle, but Emily poo-pooed it, saying she'd be fine.."

Emily nodded,"Little did I know, dear, that I would be kidnapped.. but you and Lee saved me, and we got out of there.." Amanda sighed and nodded, understanding. but saying,"I'm surprised none of us are dead, with all the near misses we've had.."

Lee took her hands, giving a comforting squeeze, saying,"I won't lie and say we don't lose people- we do in this business, but more often than not, we do our damndest to avoid bloodshed- and most of the time, we succeed.."

Amanda said,"Have I- shot anyone? Killed anyone?" Lee shook his head,"No, but you're in training in the shooting range..which worries the hell outta me, but everyone sooner or later has to go through it.."

Emily looked at her watch, and said,"I'm terribly sorry, but I'm getting tired- Lee-could I trouble you for a ride to my hotel?" Lee said,"Sure- no problem- uh, Amanda, are you gonna be ok now?"

Amanda smiled,"Oh, yeah- you go ahead- I'll see you later- I'm glad we talked, Emily-will you be in town long?"

Emily said,"Yes, I have a few things to do for the Agency, but we'll have lunch, dear- just call me, hmm?"

Amanda walked them out to the car, and Lee kissed her temple, as Emily got in."I'll call you on the way back-get some rest, huh?"

Amanda nodded, as they drove off. Sighing, she went to tidy up the kitchen, and then went upstairs to her room, and got ready for bed. As she was falling asleep, the phone picked up, so the family could sleep."Hello?"

It was Lee."How ya doin'?" Amanda said,"I'm ok.." But Lee could tell something was bothering her, and said,"You don't sound fine- want me to come over?" Amanda said,"Yeah, would you?"

Lee smiled into the phone,"Sure- I'll meet you at the patio.." Whe he got there, she was in her robe, and slippers. She said,"Hi- I just wanted to get comfortable.."

Lee said,"Well, are you all right? I know talking about Ariana upset you-.." Amanda said,"Oh, I'll be ok-it was that high dive we took that I didn't like.."

Lee shook his head in amazement! "Wow! You are rememberimg a lot more than before-it's great- it really is-I'm so proud of you!" Amanda sat down, gingerly, and Lee said,"You ok?"

Amanda said,"Headache..sorry- I wish I could get rid of it-would you..would you walk me upstairs, and stay until I go to sleep?"

Lee agreed, and they went up. He wondered if he should check with Scardelli again-it worried him that her headaches went on, even though her memory was at last getting better. He would talk to him first thing in the morning..

TBC


	16. Chapter 16

Starting Over-Chapter Sixteen

The next morning, Lee went to the Agency, and talked with Dr. Scardelli about Amanda's ongoing headaches, and memory surges. "What do you think is happening here, Doc?"

Just then, the phone rang in Scardelli's office. He picked up, and then he said,"What?! All right.. I'll tell him.." Hanging up, he said to Lee,"Mrs. West just called- Amanda's been taken to Arlington Memorial.."

Lee wasted no time leaving, and was there within an hour! He met Dotty in the waiting room, and said,"What happened?! Is she going to be ok?"

Dotty shook her head, saying,"The boys ran into my room,saying they found Amanda on the floor in her bathroom, and couldn't wake her up-ohh, to see their mother like that..-anyway, I called an ambulance, and they're checking her out now.. God, after all my baby's been through, and now this!.."

Lee held her, saying,"She's strong- she'll be fine-we've gotta believe, right?" Dotty wiped her face, and sighed."You're right, Lee- but I'm just so frightened for her.." Just then, the on-call doctor came out."Mrs. West?"

Dotty went to him, saying,"How is she, Doctor?" The doctor said," She's asking for Lee Stetson.." Lee said,"I'm Lee..what's going on, Doc?!"

The doctor hesitated, but Dotty said,"No- you go ahead, Lee- I'll see her soon enough.." Lee went back with the doctor to the ICU. The doctor said to Amanda,"Mrs. King? Your friend Lee is here- I'll just leave you for a few minutes.."

He left, and Lee noticed something strange with Amanda, as he sat in the chair near her bed. Taking her hand, he squeezed it, saying,"Look at me, Amanda- hey.. you are gonna be fine-are you listening to me?"

Amanda then tearfully said,"I can hear you, b-but I-I can't s-see you!" Lee was thunderstruck! "What?! Wait- what happened when you woke up this morning?" Amanda shook her head."I-I don't know- I went to my bathroom to take a shower, but then this pain behind my eyes came, and that's all I remember-that it hurt like hell.. I'm scared, Lee- scared I won't see again!"

Lee kissed her hand, and said soothingly,"Hey, shh- relax,ok? We're gonna find out what the hell is going on, and fix it.."Just then, the doctor came in with Dotty, and he said,"Our tests show that there's more pressure in your cranial area, Mrs. King, and we'll have to go in again to relieve it.."

Amanda said sadly,"Is that why my vision's gone?" Dotty was stunned! "Gone?! What do you mean, gone? Amanda- you can't see anything?!" Amanda wept,"N-no, Mother, and I'm so scared right now!"

Dotty hugged her daughter!" Oh, honey- we're gonna be right here-don't worry.." She looked at the doctor, and said,"Is this surgery difficult? How long will it take? Will she be all right afterwards?"

The doctor held up his hand! "We will do everything we can for her- sometimes a second surgery is necessary to lead to a full recovery- also, the love and support of friends and family helps as well-we need to prep her now..we'll let you know when she's in the recovery room.."

The nurse came in, and Dotty kissed Amanda saying,"Panda, I'll be right outside, and don't worry- your daddy's with you also..I love you.." Amanda hugged her mother."I love you, too.."

Dotty left, and Lee swallowed hard as he took Amanda's hand. He said,"I'm not going anywhere either.." He sat on the edge of her bed, and pulled her to him gently, and said softly,"I'm making a reservation for us at Emelio's, when you're back on your feet- notice I said,"when", and not"if"-so you just hang onto that, ok?"

Amanda nodded with tears in her eyes, and said,"Well, now, I have to get better, don't I?" Lee said,"You bet.." He gently kissed her, and she responded, not wanting him to leave her. But he got up, giving her hands a final squeeze, and said,"See ya later.."

Lee went out to the waiting room, and saw Dotty in one of the chairs, and going to her side, took her hand, saying,"Let's take a walk.." Dotty smiled, getting up, and said,"I thought you'd never ask.." The two wound up at the hospital chapel again to pray for a woman who meant the world to them, hoping she'd come back to them stronger than ever..

TBC


	17. Chapter 17

Starting Over- Chapter Seventeen

It had been a few hours since Amanda had been taken to surgery. Dotty and Lee spent time in the hospital chapel, and in the cafeteria, and now were back in the waiting area, with their coffee. Lee said to Dotty,"Are you sure you don't want to lie down somewhere? I could get-?.."

But Dotty shook her head."No, thank you- I mean, the surgery should be over soon- I just don't want to be away from her.." Lee then said,"What about the boys? They're in school right?"

Dotty nodded,"Yes, I had a neighbor take them, and she'll be picking them up later-they wanted so much to be here, but they need to keep their minds occupied-besides, they'd just be sitting here like we are- I told the neighbor I'd call when I had any news.."

Just then, the doctor came out. Dotty and Lee stood up, and Dotty said,"How's Amanda? Is she awake? Can I see her?" The doctor said,"The surgery went very well- the pressure's relieved, but we won't know anything else until she wakes up- she's in Recovery right now-you can see her in a little while.. now, if you'll excuse me, I have to see some other patients.."

Dotty and Lee thanked him as he left, and hugged one another! Dotty said,"I'm gonna call our neighbor-the boys will be thrilled!" Lee nodded."I have to check in with our boss as well-see you in a bit.."

Lee went out to his car, and called Billy."Amanda's out of surgery, but they won't know anything until she wakes up.." Billy smiled, and gestured to Francine to come into his office to hear the good news. "That's great, Scarecrow- give her our best, will you?" Billy had the phone on speaker, and Francine said,"Hope everything goes well, Lee- I mean it- look, about the other day-?.."

Lee shook his head,"It's ok, Francine-don't worry about it- you were just having one of those days-by the way, did Fred ever pay you back for lunch?.." Francine laughed,"Oh, you bet-big time- I'll tell you about it later!"

Lee sighed. Typical gossip queen..it figured. He said,"Well, I've gotta get back-talk to you later.." He hung up, and went back into the hospital, where a nurse stopped him."Are you Mr. Stetson?"

Lee said,"Yes- is Mrs. King awake?" The nurse nodded,smiling,"Yes, a few moments ago- her mother is with her as we speak-c'mon.."

They entered the Recovery area, and the nurse left him and Dotty with Amanda. Lee came over, and took her hand, stroking the top with his thumb gently, saying,"Hey, pretty lady-we gotta stop meeting like this.."

Amanda's head was once again bandaged,but this time, both eyes were covered as well. She teased,"Well, then stop coming here- I mean, sick people usually aren't in your day-to-day life, mister.."

Lee then kissed her hand, saying softly,"I think I could definitely make an exception-reorganize my priorities, as it were.." Dotty, meanwhile, was watching the two, and it suddenly struck her, by listening to their verbal foreplay, that they were falling in love- or at least heading in that direction!

Dotty wondered why Amanda hadn't said anything before- considering how wonderful Lee's been lately- it would stand to reason-if Amanda didn't care about him, she would've gotten rid of him long ago, and as for Lee, no man's pride would let him stay around, if he had the slightest hint that he didn't stand a chance with her daughter, or any other woman.

Dotty reflected on Amanda's relationships with Joe, and Dean. She had ten up and down years with Joe, albeit two wonderful children-but perhaps she'd really hadn't been ready at the time to be married-and he hadn't either.

Dotty never admitted this to Amanda, but she always felt that they should have taken more time to get to know one another before getting married- then there was Dean- he was strong, dependable-safe- he was, she felt, Amanda's harbor after Amanda's marriage ended- she really felt Amanda had found the right one- but after a year, Amanda still didn't feel typical stirrings of someone deeply in love-oh, she cared about him, and he was good to her boys, but it wasn't to be.

Now, this man..Lee Stetson.. what was he all about? Here, she had spent all this time with him, and all she knew was that they worked together, and they were friends. It was obvious that he cared deeper than a friend would! She decided to have a talk with him soon..

TBC


	18. Chapter 18

Starting Over- Chapter Eighteen

The doctor came in while Dotty was watching her daughter interact with Lee. He said,"Well, Amanda- how are you feeling?" Amanda said,"Look, I get that my head is bandaged, but what about my eyes?" The doctor said,"Don't worry- we dialated them- we wanted to see if there was truly a loss of vision or something else.."

Lee said,"What do you mean, Doc?" The doctor said,"Often in cases like this, a patient becomes overwhelmed by what they remember and what they can't, and causes what seems to be in this particular case, "Hysterical blindness-" but don't worry- in most cases, it clears up-you just have to relax, and let your mind put things to rights..do you understand?"

Amanda sighed,"I think I do, Doctor- how long will I be in here this time?" The doctor said,"I'd like to keep you overnight, and I'll check on you in the morning..but please-just let things come back to you naturally- I know you want to get better, but you just can't rush things, all right?"

Amanda nodded,"Ok.." He left, and Lee said, "I'd better go, and let you get some rest, ok?" But Amanda said,"You're coming back, right?" Lee kissed her forehead, saying,"Try and stop me- see you tomorrow.."

He left, and Amanda said,"Well, Mother, I guess it's just you and me- how about a Cary Grant movie?" Dotty laughed. Meanwhile, Lee headed home, thinking how much he wanted to be with Amanda then, but she still had a long road ahead, and that he'd only be in the way.

Later that night, he was awakened by the phone. Groggily, he said,"Yeah?.." A soft voice said,"Lee? It's me- can you come by?" Lee shook his head, saying,"Amanda,,I..-" He looked at the clock. It was 3 AM.'Uh, yeah, but visiting hours aren't 'til-?.."

Amanda said,"Please? Jill's gonna sneak you in- it's important- please?" Lee couldn't refuse her,even if he wanted to. "Ok, what's up?" Amanda said,"I'll tell you when you get here.."

She hung up, and Lee shook his head again. What was she up to? When he got to the hospital, Jill got him in, and Amanda said,"Are we still on for Emelio's?"

Lee noticed that her eye bandages were off, and he said slowly,"You bet-um, Amanda, what am I wearing?" Amanda sighed,"Plaid shirt, jeans, and the sexiest smile I've ever seen..c'mere.."

Lee strode over to her, and they passionately embraced! Pulling back slightly, Lee said,"Are you back totally, or somewhat?" Amanda said,"Well, the doctor did tell me to relax on some memories, and I felt totally calm thinking about you..us.. does that make sense to you?"

Lee kissed her forehead, and said,"Yeah, in a way- but what about your mom?" Amanda said,"Well, I called her earlier, telling her what I'd dreamt about, and she told me to call you- since it was about you.."

Lee said concernedly,"No headaches now?" Amanda shook her head,"No, and I've been thinking- wouldn't it be better all around if I just told my family the truth?'

Lee said immediately,"No- Amanda- they would be targets-.." Amanda said,"But you would be there to make sure we're ok- besides, I was talking about what you said to me a while back.. you don't feel that way any more about me?.."

Lee swallowed hard, and nodded,"Of course I still feel that way about you- always, but this is gonna be hard- your mom's great, but when she finds out about our real job-.."

Amanda said, shrugging,"I know, but she always wants me to be happy- look, I already talked to Billy- he's gonna help out, and this will make me happy- what do you say, big fella- want to give this a shot?"

Lee pretended to hesitate."Gee, I dunno.." Amanda punched his arm!"Not funny, Scarecrow- not funny at all!" They made plans to tell Dotty in the morning..

TBC


	19. Chapter 19

Starting Over- Chapter Nineteen

Lee met Dotty in the hospital cafeteria the next morning, and they had coffee, while the doctor was examining Amanda one last time before releasing her-hopefully for good this time.

Dotty said to Lee,"So, what's going on with you and my daughter? She called me last night, telling me about some memory concerning you, but she wasn't sure of some aspects of it, and I told her to call you..what exactly transpired after that, or shouldn't I ask?"

Lee sipped his coffee, and said, nodding,"You may, but it's at a "all in due time" frame situation.." Dotty said in a mockingly hurt tone,"Why, Lee Stetson, that was certainly cagey! What is it- a need-to-know sort of thing?"

Lee choked on his coffee, then, and Dotty got him some water, and patted his back! She exclaimed,"Goodness, I'm so sorry!" Lee drank the water slowly, and when he could speak, said raspily,"Thanks..sorry.. wrong pipe."

As he began clearing his throat, Dotty quipped, "Well, at least we're in a hospital..are you sure you're ok?" She suddenly began to giggle, and Lee said,staring at her,"Yeah..are you?"

Dotty nodded, still giggling, and said,"I-I was j-just th-thinking- how ironic it would be-.." Lee said, "Go on.." Dotty sighed,"Well, Amanda would be released, and you'd be admitted.."

Then they both began to laugh uproariously, so they didn't notice Jill bringing Amanda to them in a wheel chair. Amanda yelled above the laughter,"Excuse me- is this private, or is anybody allowed in?!"

They stopped, and Dotty jumped up, kissing Amanda! "Oh, he's released you, right?" Amanda nodded, and looking at Lee and Dotty, said,"Uh, what's going on with you two?"

Dotty shrugged, saying,"Well, Lee was choking on his coffee, I made a joke, and we laughed our stress away- it's nothing, dear- let's get you out of here.."

As they walked, Amanda tugged at Lee's arm, and he kissed her hand, saying,"I'm fine, really.." When they got to the curb, there was a cab waiting, and Lee helped Amanda in, with Dotty beside her, and he said,"I'm right behind you, ok?"

Amanda nodded, feeling very much the outsider just then. Dotty patted her arm as they left the hospital,"It's all right dear- really- Lee will be fine.."

Amanda said on the way to the house,"Mother-what was that about?" Dotty sighed,"Oh, he choked on his coffee, and I said how ironic it was that we were at the hospital- you know, you being released, and he being admitted, that's all.."

When at last they were dropped off, Dotty paid the fare, including the tip, and the driver left, Amanda looked at her mother, and said,"That wasn't funny, Mother- I don't find it funny at all!" She ran into the house, sobbing!

Lee pulled up to the curb,and parked, getting out, and said with alarm, "What happened?!" Dotty shook her head,"Honestly, I thought it was a funny bit- you choking, her release.. what now?"

Lee sighed, saying, "Let me go talk to her..it'll be ok- do you still have her pills?" Dotty walked with him in the house, nodding,"In the kitchen cabinet, with the vitamins.." Lee went to get one, and headed up, with Dotty saying,"I'll make tea, all right?" Lee nodded,"Sure, that's fine.."

When he got to Amanda's room, he knocked on the door gently."Amanda, may I come in?" Amanda was still crying a bit, but said,"Y-yeah, I guess so.." He came in, and Amanda was laying on her bed, her back to him, sniffling.

He gently moved her a bit, so he could sit next to her, and said,"Ok, sit up here, and take your medicine-.." Amanda went to sit up, and blew her nose, and said,"Lee, I know you mean well, but this stuff puts me to sleep, and-.."

Lee said,"Well, maybe that's what you need right now-c'mon, you've been all over the place the last few weeks-wait.. you know why you're upset,don't you?"

Amanda nodded slowly, and went into Lee's arms, as as he held her, he rocked her gently, stroking her. He said quietly,"You remember our cases..all of them?"

Amanda swallowed hard,"The good, and the bad-especially the bad- you- you almost-.." Lee shook his head,"But I didn't- Amanda, I didn't!"

He straightened, and cupped her face,"Look at me- look at me, Amanda.." Tears came to her eyes as she did, and he said,"There's a lot of things we can do to try and prevent things from happening, and most times we succeed, but not every time, but, hey, I'm glad this time around, I have you to help me, you know.."

As Amanda wiped her eyes, Lee said,"Uh, so.. about what we were gonna tell your mom..do you still want to?"

Amanda said," Well, I know what lifestyle you're used to, but can you handle this? Suburbia with all the trimmings? My family asking non-stop questions at every turn about our job?"

Lee kissed her, and held her saying,"I can handle that.. but being without you- uh-uh.. no way in hell, partner!" Amanda smiled in his arms, saying,"I feel the same way.." They kissed, and Lee stood up, pulling her with him, saying,"Let's go talk to your mom.."

TBC


	20. Chapter 20

Starting Over-Chapter Twenty

When Lee and Amanda came downstairs, Dotty went to hug her daughter,"Oh, honey, I'm so sorry- it really was just a joke- are you all right now?"

Amanda nodded, and sighed, saying,"Yeah, I'll be ok- Lee pointed out that I've had a lot to deal with as it is, so everything just got to me..um, could we talk to you? There's some things we need to tell you.."

Dotty looked worried."Oh- you don't mean?.." Amanda said,"Oh- no,no, Mother- I'm not going back to the hospital- I'm fine, really.. it's about our job, and what I remembered..let's sit in here.."

Dotty said,"Let me get the tea.." She brought everything into the family room, and they sat on the sofa, and she passed the tea to both, and then took a sip of her own. "Now, what is it, dear?"

Amanda said slowly,"Well, do you remember when I was dating Dean, and I took him to the train station, so he wouldn't have to leave his car out in the rain when he was on his trip?"

Dotty nodded,"That was nice of you, dear, but I still didn't understand why you didn't change- she went in her nightgown, if you can imagine.."

Lee said,"Well, I don't have to imagine, because I was there.." Dotty shook her head."But I thought you met much later, through that woman you said was your client, Amanda.."

Amanda nodded, "Yes, well, actually, she wasn't a client, Mother..she and Lee already were working together when Lee and I first met..at the train station.."

Dotty put her cup down, and said,"Ok, now I'm confused- how did you meet? Did Dean meet him before he left?"

Amanda said,"No.. I was walking away from the platform, and Lee showed up suddenly, in a waiter's outfit, needing me to deliver a package on the train to a man in a red hat..he was desperate- some very bad people were following him with guns-.."

Dotty said loudly,"Guns?" Lee said, trying to calm her,"She wasn't in any danger, Dotty- she got on the train, while I was dealing with those men..unfortunately, the problems came later, but it all worked out- she was hired by our boss, after saving my life on a helicopter ride.."

Dotty snapped her fingers! Looking at Amanda,she said,"You came home, drenched,saying something about a new club-whales, or-.." Amanda finished for her."Clams..it was clams, Mother..and I'm sorry I had to lie to you about that too, but all that, plus all the trips for the job-they were actual trips, but what I told you about IFF? Well, it's a cover for what we really do.."

Dotty said, chuckling,"Sounds like the movie,"The Spy That Came In From The Cold" or something equally James Bond-ish!" When they didn't respond, she looked at both of them shakily, and said,"Are you trying to tell me, that all this time, Amanda Jean- all this time, you've been CIA, or FBI, or whatever the hell is going on here?!"

Lee said,"Look, I know it's a shock, Dotty, but she's great at the job, and believe me, I did try in the beginning to talk her out of staying, but our boss was pretty impressed, so I've been helping her stay safe, and vice versa.."

Dotty said, shaking her head, and standing up, saying,"Am I to reward you for putting my daughter's life in danger?! How dare you?! And now that I know things, am I in danger as well?! Are our boys in any danger?!"

Amanda stood, reaching out to her mother,"Please, Mother, let's sit calmly, and discuss this-.." Dotty pulled away from Amanda! "No! Your father and I tried to bring you up properly- to have good morality, and decency, and know right from wrong.. what about your boys? What could happen to them?"

Amanda swallowed hard, and said,"I'm doing this for them- so that the world is safer for them- that's why I chose this business-.." Dotty said quietly,"Have you-do you ever shoot anyone?"

Lee said,"No- she hasn't- she doesn't like using guns-.." Dotty nodded,"Thank God for small favors.." Dotty crossed the room to go to the stairs, and Amanda felt tears come to her eyes,"Mother..please talk to me? I don't like to see you this way.."

Dotty looked at them both, and said, "Then perhaps you should've thought about it more when you were helping him that day..I need you both to leave for a while- I won't say anything to the boys- that is your job.."

Dotty went upstairs to her room, and Amanda sank to the couch in despair, and wept, as Lee held her! Amanda knew it would be hard, but she never expected this reaction!

Lee said quietly,"C'mon, we'll go to my place for a while- just go up, and pack a few things- you can call the boys later, huh?" Amanda nodded, wiping her eyes. Going to the counter, she wrote a short note for the boys, telling them where she'd be, and that she loved them.

Lee said,"I'll be outside in the car, ok?" Amanda nodded numbly, and went upstairs to her room. She packed enough for a few days, and then took the framed photo of the four of them that was on her nightstand, and placed it in her bag as well.

Coming out of her room, she stopped by her mother's door, and knocked softly."Mother? I'm gonna be at Lee's, if you- well, if the boys need anything, all right? I.. I love you all very much, and I hope we can talk about this again soon.. pl-please don't hate me, Mother.. I am trying to make it safer for all of us.."

As Amanda headed out the door, going to Lee's car, Dotty watched from her bedroom window, tears streaming down her face! She sobbed,"Oh, Carl- I've lost you- what about my baby?! I can't lose her too! Why can't she see that?!"

TBC


	21. Chapter 21

Starting Over- Chapter 21

Lee let them into his apartment, saying, "Just put your bag in my room- I'll sleep out here tonight.."

But Amanda shook her head."No- I will- I've disrupted your routine enough lately, but I'm fine now- all I have to do is make things right with my family.."

Lee took her bag from her, put it in his room, and pointed to the couch, saying,"Please sit down- we need to set things straight ourselves.."

Amanda sat down wearily, saying,"I know what you're going to say, Lee- that my mother will get over it- well, you don't realize how hard it was for all of us after Joe left, the crying, the yelling, and then the pouting- the boys-not us girls- ok, I did my share of crying- but only at night- I had to be strong for all of us.."

Lee joined her on the couch, taking her hand," Well, the boys have adjusted, right? And this whole thing with your memory since the accident took it's toll also- but it's all gonna work itself out- you trust me, right?"

Amanda nodded slowly, saying,"Yeah, but did you see the look in my mother's eyes? It was like I was a stranger to her- I don't think our relationship can be fixed as easily as you think.."

Lee sighed, and stroked the top of her hand with his thumb."Ok, then what about us? You and me?" Amanda shrugged,"It'll be fine- I'll quit the Agency, and still see you when I can.."

But Lee slowly let go of her hand, and getting up, went to look out the window from his living room. Amanda stared after him, saying,"What is it?" Lee shrugged,"It's not that simple- I really wish it were, though.."

Amanda sighed, and went to his side. "What aren't you telling me?" Lee said, "There's a mandated rule they set up years ago- anyone that leaves the business.. well, they can't be involved with an agent..it's got to do with the target issue- if something were to happen to you or the family-the government can't be held responsible-.."

Amanda was shocked! "What?! But what if an enemy were to gun me down? What then?" Lee said,"It would be just another unfortunate homicide of a civilian who was at the wrong place, at the wrong time- look, are you seriously thinking about leaving, because I just can't put myself through another partner- I could wind up with someone like Fred Fielder, for God's sake!"

Amanda went into his arms, and said slowly,"Ok, tell me the up side then.." Lee said gently,"Well, Billy could arrange for special security for the house, you could help your mother with what she needs to know to be as safe as she can, and I could help the boys with self-defense for school, and home.."

Amanda nodded,"Ok- what about Joe? Do we let him in on all this? I mean, he already knows some of what I do- I think, as the father of my boys, I should at least clue him in- he'd be able to keep them safe if you or I were away on a case, huh?"

Just then, the phone rang. Lee picked up."Stetson.. oh, hi, Phillip- yeah, she's right here.."He gave the phone to Amanda, saying,"I'm gonna go out for a bit- give you some privacy, ok?"

Amanda kissed him, saying,"Thanks- you won't be gone long, right?" Lee smiled, and said,"Can't get rid of me that easy.." He left, and Amanda went back to the phone.

Meanwhile, Lee called Billy from his car. "Can you meet me at Monty's? It's important.." They met a short time later, and they sat in a back booth, and ordered drinks, and Billy said," Everything all right with Amanda?" Lee shrugged, saying,"Define all right? I think there's something you ought to know.."

When Lee finished telling Billy what happened at the house with Amanda and her mother, Billy just said,"Do you love her?" Lee was surprised! "What?" Billy, exasperated at the younger agent, said,"Do you, Lee Stetson, love Amanda King- yes or no?!"

Lee said," I do, but I don't know how she feels yet, because of her family situation right now-.." Billy said,"Leave the world and all the problems out there- I've got a pretty good idea how she feels anyway.." Sighing, Billy got up, and said,"Ok, go home.. I got this covered- tell Amanda not to worry, and I'll call you first thing in the morning.."

Lee yelled after Billy as he was leaving,"Wait! You got what covered?! Billy!" Lee groaned, as he paid the bar bill, and headed for his car. Just what was Billy up to?! As Lee drove home, he thought about going to Dotty to try pleading his case to soften her up, but then decided against it..no.. that would have to be Amanda's decision- it was after all, her family.

How in the hell did everything suddenly get so complicated?! He never thought he'd ever be in this kind of situation- if someone had told him years ago, that a housewife would turn his life upside down suddenly, and that he'd fall for someone like that completely, he'd have told them they were nuts!

Turning into his apartment lot, and parking, he got out, hoping that Amanda had some luck with her family, and that her mother would be calmer about the situation. When he came into the apartment, however, Amanda was sitting on the couch, with a bottle of wine, and pouring herself a glass.

When she saw him, she said woodenly," I spoke to the boys- seems that Mother talked to Joe- he'll be here in the morning to discuss changing the custody agreement- he wants to go for full custody- care to tell me what we do about that?!"

TBC


	22. Chapter 22

Starting Over- Chapter 22

Lee shook his head at Amanda's announcement about Joe's visit, saying,"Between the two of you, you happen to be the more stable parent- willing to be there for them- he comes and goes as his job entails-.."

Amanda sighed, saying,"If you think about it, Lee, you and I do the same thing-.." Lee yelled,"In what universe?! Look, if those kids were with him, he wouldn't have help- you at least have your mother living with you-.."

Amanda shrugged,"Yeah, and she's currently not speaking to me, and if I know her, as I have all these years, she's not likely to budge in my defense on this- she's absolutely furious with me right now- and I can't really blame her-.."

Lee came over to the couch, bringing a wine glass with him, and poured some for himself, and refilled her glass, saying," I thought about this on the way back here- what if I were to try and make her see reason about this whole thing-.."

Amanda shook her head."No- look, I really appreciate what you've done lately, helping me get better and all, but maybe it wasn't a good idea after all, to tell her the truth-.."

Lee said,"Oh.. so you wanna forget this whole thing, and cave in like you usually do- play it safe- don't upset your mother-.."

Amanda stood up angrily! "I don't- how dare you! Just because you don't know the first thing about raising a family, or being married- how can you sit there and judge me like this!"

Lee stood up angry as well, and said,"Well, first of all, I don't call Billy when we're out on a case as often as you call your mother- what was it, last month-you called her, middle of the day, when we were trailing someone, to check with her about coffee filters?"

Amanda was stunned."I.. thought I knew you- where is this all coming from?" Lee sighed, running a hand through his hair, exasperatedly. "I.. I dunno- I'm sorry I hurt your feelings- I just don't know how we can do this, if you stand back, and decide to do nothing..you know, let them walk over you.."

Amanda said, gulping, as tears came to her eyes,"I should go home now, because being here isn't a good idea either-.." As she went to get her bag, Lee pulled her to his arms, and held her! He shook his head,"Please don't go- that's how this whole thing started to begin with, and I for one, couldn't bear to have you lost to me again, ok?"

Amanda pulled back after a moment, and said,"Scary to be in a normal world, right?" They kissed gently, and Amanda said,"So, now what?"

Lee said, bringing her to the couch, and sitting her down, sitting down himself,"Well, Billy is handling something on the Agency front- wouldn't let me in on it.." Just then, the phone rang. It was Billy. Lee said,"Uh, sure- we're both here- c'mon up.."

Hanging up, Lee said,"Billy's on his way up..with a solution for us.."

TBC


	23. Chapter 23

Starting Over- Chapter 23

Lee let Billy in, and said,"Ok, what do you have for us?" Billy said to Amanda,"How are you, dear? It's been a while.."

Amanda shrugged,"All right, except for this whole custody thing- I can't believe Mother talked Joe into doing something like this.." Lee said,"Hey- can we sit down, and figure out what to do here?"

They all sat at the dining room table, and Billy said,"What exactly was your custody arrangement to begin with?" Amanda said,"Well, at the time of the divorce, we decided that the best thing was for the boys primary residence to be Arlington, but that Joe would visit on holidays or school vacations- there wasn't much of that- he did miss Christmas here and there, and school vacations were cut short, due to his work.."

Billy said,"Did he ever try to do this before?" Amanda said,"No- he agreed that it just wasn't safe where he was, but he always wrote, or phoned them on birthdays- then we discussed that when they got older, they could make up their own minds about whether or not to visit him in Africa.."

Lee sighed," I guess the way your mom sees it, they're in danger here, but do you think she's thought about them in that place?" Billy said,"Seems to me, no one's even talked to them about how they feel- how old are they now, Amanda?"

Amanda said,"Phillip's almost 12, and Jamie's almost 10- why, sir?" Billy said," I talked to Harry V. Thornton- founder of our Agency- good man-still has clout in certain areas- he's decided to waive the mandate on that pesky rule about agents and civilians, if one leaves the business-.."

Lee chuckled,"Oh, he went over Smyth's head? Whew, I bet the guy was steamed!" Billy nodded,"Had a war-sized conniption fit- then the President got involved-.."

Amanda shook her head,"Oh, no- I just thought it was like any job- you quit, and just find another one- no fuss, no muss.."

Billy said,"I just had an interesting discussion with your mother on that subject- you are part of the Government, and as an employee, you will get protection like the rest of us- your entire family included."

He continued,"Also, I've made arrangements for your boys to take special self- defense classes, and have your house set up with standard Agency equipment, so that your mother will know what to do if there's trouble. I told her that even if you got another job somewhere else, you'd still be protected.."

Amanda said,nodding,"Thank you, sir- so, she's not upset anymore?" Billy sighed,"Well, she's still afraid- I told her to have lunch with my wife- who has several stories. But the secrecy rule still stands-friends, teachers, regular people, cannot be told- safety first, hmm?"

Billy got up, and said,"I have to go.." When he got to the door, he said,"Oh..and about your relationship? Whatever it is, is fine with me..good night.."

He left, and Lee shook his head."Whoa- so, what do you think?" Amanda said, "I think it is a lot to process, and I still have to talk to Joe, and the boys, and my mother tomorrow- can we just order a pizza, and call it a night?"

Lee nodded, understanding all that had happened to her in the last few weeks. She was still trying to sort things out in her own mind, but he hoped she wasn't turning away from him-he felt that they had a chance to make a go of it, and that whatever was ahead for them, that they would face it together.

They had pizza, and wine, and watched some TV, but then Amanda turned in early. Lee cleaned up, and laid on the couch, deciding that he would try to talk to Joe himself tomorrow- before Amanda did- he wanted to know where things really stood- he didn't want Amanda hurt again..

TBC


	24. Chapter 24

Starting Over- Chapter 24

Amanda woke, as the sun was just coming up. She got her robe, and got out of bed, yawning. Coming out of the bedroom, she didn't see Lee, but the couch was back to normal, the sheets folded and placed there. His military upbringing, she thought,as she went to the kitchen.

Chuckling to herself, she often wondered why on many occasions, the apartment had seen better days, as she had seen in the first year she'd gotten to know him.

She noticed the coffee had been made, and that there was a note. Picking it up, it said: "Milk isn't half bad with my coffee- even when the date's still good on the bottle! Had to run an errand- be back soon.. L."

Amanda grinned,"Well, I have rubbed off on you- nice to know!" Shaking her head, she poured herself a cup, and headed back to the bedroom to get a shower. She noticed a towel hanging over the shower door, and realized that she didn't even hear him taking a shower.. she must have been more tired than she thought. She then set about getting ready for the day. It would be a long one for everyone.

Meanwhile, Lee was at the gate at Dulles to meet Joe King's plane. When Joe came into the waiting area, Lee stepped in front of him."Joe? I'm Lee Stetson..I thought we might have a chat before you go see your family.."

They got his luggage, and went to an airport restaurant for coffee. Sitting in a back booth, Joe said,"Look, I'm a lawyer, and I know my rights, so if you're here to arrest me to keep me from my kids, I-.." Lee shook his head, and showed him his federal ID. "No- I just wanted to talk- I know you're here because Dotty was worried about Amanda's job-.."

Joe said, nodding,"Yeah, about that- just what the hell was Amanda thinking, getting mixed up in that? I don't want my kids in danger!" Lee jumped in,"Oh, but keeping them in a war-torn place is safer, huh? I'm a world traveler myself, pal, and believe me, all the imunizations they'd have to endure- no, that's not too smart.."

Joe said,"Ok, have you ever had kids, Lee? Do you know what sacrifices you'd have to make for them? Because I have- keeping them safe and happy was my priority- and Amanda's too-!.." Lee said, "Save it- I have watched her struggle these past few years- trying to raise them,while holding down a job-yes, she's had to travel, but her mother's been there- they have both been there when the boys needed them- can you honestly say the same, Joe?"

Joe shook his head angrily,"What makes you think you're any better, Stetson?! You're no better than a cop here!" Lee seethed," I have ways to protect you don't even know about.. let me ask you something.. if the boys had trouble getting back into the states because of some paper snafu, would you be able to do anything, say,within 48 hours?"

Joe said,"I have friends in the Embassy, contacts-.." Lee said,"Well, I have contacts as well- people that owe me favors from over the years- Joe, this isn't an I'm-better-than-you kind of thing, but you don't really reside here any more- your "home" is basically in Africa, right?"

Joe said,"What are you getting at, Lee? That I'm a bad father, because I'm not here enough?" Lee said,"If you know the law like you say you do, then you'd have to establish some kind of residence here, right? And not a hotel room, or your old serority house, either- a real home, Joe, so they know you're serious about wanting permanent custody.."

Lee got up, throwing money down on the table, and said," All I'm saying is, I care about Amanda and her family, and I don't want to see her hurt any more..she's been through enough, don't you think?"

Lee walked away, hoping Joe did some serious thinking about the situation, before going full steam ahead with a new custody battle!

When he got in the apartment, Amanda was sitting on the couch, her bag packed, and she said," You saw Joe, didn't you? Mother called here, wondering if his plane was delayed- but I called the airport- they said it landed on time..why, Lee? Why couldn't you trust me enough to handle this on my own?"

TBC


	25. Chapter 25

Starting Over- Chapter 25

Lee was now in his apartment, facing the worst firing squad imaginable-Amanda, who just realized that he was the reason that she or her mother, had not heard from Joe yet!

Amanda with an icy stare at her squirming partner,"Well, where is Joe? What did you do to him?" Lee blanched at her words, saying," Oh, back the truck up, and calm the hell down, lady! I didn't do anything, or say anything that he didn't already deserve to hear!"

He shook his head, and threw his keys on the coffee table, sitting in the chair adjacent to the couch, where a fuming Amanda sat. Amanda sighed, and said,"Look, all I meant was- I've known the man for over 10 years-and he knows me, so we could have handled this without your interference-.."

Lee tried hard to stay calm, but she was pushing his buttons, one by one! " Oh, really?" Chuckling, he stood up, and began pacing like a caged animal, running both hands through his hair! He said, while pacing," I believe we've recently established that we have feelings for each other, correct?-.."

Amanda shrugged,"Of course, but-.." Lee continued,"Albeit, I told you how I felt before you did, because I was unsure of the outcome of your condition- however, I felt, memory or not, you would've let him in some small way, walk over you, and your mother, and you would lose control of the situation-.."

Amanda tried to speak, but Lee held up a hand,saying,"Please- let me finish! I did not harm him , but I simply pointed out to him things that even non- lawyers would know.."

Amanda said quietly,"Such as?" Lee swallowed hard, and cleared his throat,"Well, all the shots the boys would have to get for diseases-as much as I travel, you know I'm not spinning a yarn here.."

Amanda nodded,"Go on.." Lee said,"Then there's the obvious one- residency-he would have to establish a regular address in order to maintain custody, correct? When you got divorced,what was his address?"

Amanda said, "Well, I had his mail forwarded to the EAO office..what are you getting at?" Lee slowly went to her, and sitting down next to her on the couch, said," And the EAO office would be anywhere he set up shop for the time, right? Whatever country he happened to be in, it would probably be a P.O. box of some sort-what I'm saying is, and you know I'm right, that you've had the boys in Arlington, Virginia since their birth- they have residence here- Joe was born here, but goes all over the place, never putting down roots- I don't fault him for that- if that's what he wants to do.. but I also get why you didn't want that for the boys-see what I'm getting at?"

Amanda said,nodding,"You meant, why would he suddenly think it was a good idea to put them through that? He loves them, but hasn't thought everything through all the way?"

Lee sighed,"Yes- I'm sorry if I acted like a bull in a china shop, but it really wasn't about my own self-interest here- I do care about you, and your family, and I just wanted the right thing done here, you know?"

Just then, the phone rang. Lee picked up,"Stetson.. oh, uh, hi, Joe.. yeah, yeah, she's right here.." Giving the phone to Amanda, he said,"I need some air- I've said my piece-do what you think is best, ok?" Kissing her cheek, he grabbed his keys, and left.

TBC


	26. Chapter 26

Starting Over- Chapter 26

Amanda had a short talk on the phone with Joe after Lee left. It wasn't fair, making Lee feel like an intruder in his own home! She'd apologize later, after saying to Joe,"Look, I thought you were ok with our agreement, but if you pursue this thing, I'll just get my own lawyer- IFF has them on standby- you think real hard, Joseph King, before you pull this trigger- I can play hardball too!"

Hanging up, angrily, she growled,"Ooh, that man! Who does he think he is anyway?!" Amanda got her purse, and her bag, and called a cab. It was time for her to go home.

When she got there, she paid the cab driver, and went into the house. Going upstairs, she put away her clothes, and her bag, and went back downstairs to make some tea. Her mother came in from the back yard."Hello, Amanda- did you hear from Joe?"

Amanda held her temper in check, saying,"Yes, Mother- thanks to you, he's thinking about full custody- look, I know you're worried about the boys, but I also know that Mr. Melrose already talked to you about setting the house up with security measures, but if it's Lee you're worried about, you don't have to worry on that score either!"

Amanda's eyes glistened with tears, as she continued."I wasn't sure I'd ever find what I've found with Lee- the divorce tore me to shreds- I wasn't sure I was worthy of anyone else's love after that- but Lee and I are together- we're taking it slow, obviously because of opposition from you, and Joe-but, you see Mother, it's not your call to make..or Joe's.."

Amanda went upstairs to her room, closing the door, and laying down on her bed, cried herself to sleep! She woke just before dinner, and there was a knock on her bedroom door. She said, sitting up,"Come in.." It was Phillip."Mom- Dad's here- he wants to take Jamie and I out for dinner and a movie- can we go?"

Amanda nodded slowly, saying,"Yeah, take your sweaters,ok? It gets cold in the theater.. hey..give me a hug.." Phillip hugged her, and she kissed him, as they said goodbye.

She waited until she saw Joe's car pull away, and then dialed Lee's car number. Lee answered,"Stetson.." Amanda said,"Lee? Can you do me a favor, please, and have one of our guys keep an eye on Joe tonight? He's taken the boys out for dinner and a movie, but I'd feel better if I actually knew that for sure-also, could you come over for dinner? I know I'm not your favorite person right now, but I could use a friendly face here.."

Lee smiled into the phone,"Me too- what about your mom? Do I need a white flag?" Amanda said, sighing,"No- it's my house anyway- she'll just have to deal with it- oh, and bring some wine too please- I don't know if I have enough here, ok?"

Lee said,"You've got it- let me alert the guys- see you soon.." They hung up, and Amanda went to change, and came down, and saw her mother reading. She said, going to the refrigerator,"Do we still have that casserole, or meat loaf from a few days ago? Lee's coming for dinner.."

Dotty didn't answer, and Amanda slowly went to her, and sitting next to her on the couch, put a hand on her arm. Swallowing hard, she said,"Mother, please try to understand- I-I don't want you to h-hate me for this-!.."

Dotty put down her book, stunned! "Amanda Jean! I could never hate you! I'm worried about this family-can't you understand that?!"

Lee suddenly came in from the patio, and closed the door, and going over to Dotty, he sat in front of her on the coffee table, and took her hands gently, saying,"Dotty, I love your daughter very, very much, and I will do everything humanly possible to keep us all safe- we've worked together for almost three years now, and she's still here- shouldn't that tell you that I don't give up without one hell of a good fight?"

Dotty looked at Lee, and then Amanda, and shaking her head, got up, saying,"Ok- you've got my blessing, but what about the boys? When are you telling them?"

Amanda said,"Not until I know what Joe's gonna do, Mother.." Dotty said,"I'm sorry I got so angry- but your job frightens me- I was worried for the boys, I was worried for you-ohh.."

Amanda held her mother."It's gonna be all right, Mother..really- as long as we know how to protect ourselves.." She heard the front door open, and went to see Phillip and Jamie come in!

She said,"I thought you were going to a movie, too?" Phillip went upstairs without a word, and Jamie said quietly,"Uh, yeah, well, Dad got a call..he had to go back to Africa tonight, so he dropped us off on his way back to his hotel room..Mom, why does he do that?"

Amanda hugged her youngest child."Oh, honey, you know, sometimes, he just has to go- it doesn't mean Daddy doesn't love you guys- he does..it's just..well.." She sighed, and Jamie kissed her,"I'm gonna go up- night.."

Amanda felt a lump in her throat, as she watched Jamie go up. She walked back slowly to the kitchen, thinking, "Damn you, Joe King!" She saw Lee and Dotty look at her, and she said,"I gotta get some air.."

She went out to the patio, and Lee followed her, and held her as she cried,"P-promise me, if we ever have kids, that you won't do that to them-ever- I hate him when he does that to them!"

Lee stroked her gently, and said softly,"I promise, honey, I promise..shh.." He then gently pushed back from her, saying,"Let me check with our people to see where he's headed for sure, ok?" Amanda nodded, and they kissed, and Lee went to his car, while Amanda went back to the kitchen, to get a tissue. Dotty said,"I put the casserole in the oven- is Lee coming back?"

Amanda nodded, blowing her nose, and dabbing her eyes."Yeah- he had to call work-uh-need-to-know stuff.." Dotty nodded, and said,"Are you all right?" Amanda shook her head,"I am, but our boys sure aren't- Joe had to return to Africa tonight- dropped them off after dinner- the hurt looks in their eyes when they came in- it was just heartbreaking.."

Lee came back in, and said, "Gee, something smells good- oh, here- I forgot.." He handed Amanda the wine bottle, and she went to get glasses, and he poured for all three of them.

Dotty sipped, saying,"Boy, did we need this after everything we've been through.. well.. to my daughter's good health again- may it last forever, and to the man that made it all possible with plenty of TLC.."

They clinked glasses, and Lee and Amanda kissed, and they all went on to have dinner, with Amanda wondering what Lee found out about Joe, and whether she'd still have something to worry about regarding custody of her boys..

TBC


	27. Chapter 27

Starting Over- Chapter 27

Lee and Amanda, after she and Dotty had cleaned up following dinner, had gone to the gazebo to talk. Amanda wanted to know what happened with Joe, why he'd dropped his sons off at the house so early.

Lee said, as they sat on the bench,"The guys watching Joe confirmed that he did actually have a flight to Africa, leaving now, as a matter of fact.."

Amanda sighed,"Oh.. I can't believe what I thought he might do..Lee, I was really afraid he'd-.." Lee squeezed her hands."I know, I know-me too..especially after I talked with him at the airport..I'm real sorry I scared you- I just- I wanted him to know, well, where things stood once and for all.."

Amanda hugged him, saying,"That was very sweet, actually- after I had time to think about it- and I'm sorry I got so upset-.." Lee kissed her, and said,"Hey, can we put all the sorrys away for now, and concentrate on us now? I think we're long overdue.."

They were about to kiss once more, when Dotty called out,"Lee? Are you still here? There's a phone call for you- I think it's IFF.." Amanda followed Lee back to the house, saying,"He's on the way, Mother.."

While Lee was on the phone, Amanda and Dotty went upstairs to check on the boys- thankfully, they were both asleep. Amanda kissed both of them, and left their room quietly.

Dotty said to her in the hall,"Is everything all right with Joe now?" Amanda shrugged,"I dunno-I'll probably hear from him after he lands-we'll see.." Dotty hugged her,"Well, I'm going to bed- goodnight, love.." Amanda returned the hug."Goodnight, Mother- see you in the morning.."

Lee signalled her to join him downstairs. Taking his hand,she followed him to the kitchen, saying,"Well, the boys are asleep- what happened? Who was that who called?"

Lee said,"Billy- he's having a contact at the airport in Africa call him back when Joe lands.. I think we can relax now.."

Amanda said, leading him to the family room couch, as they both sat,"Speaking of relaxing..you were saying we should um, concentrate on us more?" They kissed gently, then with more fervor, and Lee pulled back finally,saying,"Ah, I think I'd better go.."

Amanda shook her head,"I can't believe you got me all hot and bothered, and then you-.." Lee blushed shyly,"Hey, c'mon, your family's right upstairs.."

Amanda said,"Chicken.. ok, ok, I'll walk you out- you had your chance.." They got outside to his car, and she leaned back against the driver's door, and said,"You don't really wanna go, do you?"

They kissed more passionately this time, and it took everything Lee had to not sweep her up, and carry her to her room, the way he always wanted to! He pulled back slowly, and whispered,"See ya later.. um, by the way, you do realize your mother has probably been watching us this entire time?"

Amanda smiled and nodded,"Uh-huh.." Lee swallowed hard, "She- she'll probably ask- uh, interrogate you when you go in, you know that, right?"

Amanda again smiled."Oh, yeah.." Lee got in the car, and then put down the window, and she leaned in, giving him brushes against his mouth, making him crazy! He said softly against her mouth," W-what are you gonna t-tell her..mm-mm?"

Amanda said in reply,"T-that I've been on t-the pill, ands-she has n-nothing tow-worry about-.." Lee pulled back and stared at her. She shrugged,"What? It's the first honest thing I could tell her since we met, right?"

Lee put the car in gear, and said, putting up the window,"Night- see you later.." He left, and Amanda grinned from ear to ear! She loved that she could actually shock the man!

She went into the house, laughing! Dotty said,"May I ask what you're amused about, young lady?" Amanda giggled, going up the stairs, and said,'Life, Mother.. just life..glad to be back!"

Dotty shook her head as she followed her daughter upstairs, thinking, "It's a lot more than life making you giddy- and I couldn't be happier- thank you, Lee Stetson!"

The End


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